STOP THE DEPORTATIONS THE DOMA PROJECT

Our New Website Set to Launch Tomorrow

2011-11-21T16:40:00.002-08:00

For the past few months volunteers have been hard at work to design and launch a new website for The DOMA Project's Stop The Deportations, Separations and Exile campaign. We are happy to announce that the site will officially launch tomorrow, November 22. We will no longer update this site, so please come visit us at here. As we continue to work to improve our site, we welcome your feedback. Please let us know what you think of our new design us via confidential email.

GLAAD Launches Call To Action: Tell President Obama to Stop The DOMA Deportations, Enforce His Promised LGBT-Inclusive Guidelines and Keep Brian & Anton Together

2011-10-12T20:43:00.000-07:00

Sign the petition to President Obama here today. Time is running out for Brian & Anton. Share this link with your friends. We must stop this deportation!

DHS Admits The Administration Needs to Provide "Additional Training" To Ensure New Guidelines Are Properly Applied. Will It Come In Time For Brian & Anton?

2011-10-10T12:22:00.000-07:00

See "Officials Deny Deportation Reprieve for Gay Binational Couple," The Advocate, Friday October 6, 2011.

ICE Denies Brian & Anton's Request for Deferred Action, Refuses to Stop the Deportation - Obama Administration New LGBT-Inclusive Policy Fails to Stop DOMA Deportation

2011-10-07T11:50:00.003-07:00

PHILADELPHIA DEPORTATION OFFICERS DENY REQUEST BY GAY BINATIONAL COUPLE FOR “DEFERRED ACTION”

_______________________

ICE REFUSES TO APPLY NEW OBAMA ADMINISTRATION DEPORTATION GUIDELINES TO STOP “DOMA DEPORTATION” OF GAY INDONESIAN MARRIED TO U.S. CITIZEN

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IN A FIRST TEST OF NEW DEPORTATION POLICY MEANT TO SET ASIDE LOW PRIORITY CASES, INCLUDING FOR LGBT FAMILIES, THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION FAILS TO DELIVER

PHILADELPHIA, OCTOBER 7, 2011 – The Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) office in Philadelphia has refused to stop the deportation that would separate Anton Tanumihardja, an Indonesian citizen, from his American husband, Brian Andersen, despite new guidelines issued by the Obama administration that are intended to set aside all low-priority deportation cases and keep all families together – including gay and lesbian couples.

Brian and Anton at home in Philadelphia earlier this year

Specifically, ICE rejected their request for “deferred action,” a remedy that allows individuals meeting specific criteria to stay in the country indefinitely, even though they are technically deportable. At a meeting today with a Philadelphia deportation officer, Anton was told that unless there was some intervention in his case that reversed this decision, he would face deportation by January.

In its decision, ICE said only that they denied the request because there was nothing “extraordinary” about their case. The Field Office Director did not explain how he arrived at this decision or why he would only grant deferred action to “extraordinary cases.” ICE did not explain why they were not applying the guidelines set forth on June 19 by ICE Director John Morton. ICE made no mention of the August 18 letter by Department of Homeland Security (DHS) Secretary Janet Napolitano announcing the administration’s intent to conduct a system-wide review to ensure that all low-priority deportation cases were set aside, and made no mention of the DHS clarification on that day that LGBT families are included in the guidelines.

Statement from Lavi Soloway, lawyer for Anton Tanumihardja & Brian Andersen, and founder of Stop The Deportations:

“We are shocked and disappointed that ICE has failed to implement the guidelines set forth by this administration. The Obama administration made a commitment to stop deportations that would tear apart families, including gay and lesbian couples, and yet in its decision the ICE office in Philadelphia is failing to make good on that commitment. The administration must take immediate action to ensure that the new deportation policy is being implemented fairly and consistently by ICE deportation officers in local offices, or this policy announcement is meaningless.”

Anton Tanumihardja satisfies numerous criteria set forth by the administration in its prosecutorial discretion guidelines: (1) he has strong ties to Philadelphia which has been his home for the past 9 years; (2) he is a hard working and respected member of his community; (3) ever since fleeing Indonesia, he has pursued a legal immigration process that was ultimately unsuccessful; (4) he is married to his U.S. citizen spouse, Brian Anderson, and has strong family relationships to his spouse and his spouse’s family; (5) he has no ties to Indonesia, a country he fled because of persecution due to his identity as a gay man, Christian and an ethnic Chinese person. The guidelines set forth by DHS also require ICE to consider conditions in the country to which one (i.e., Anton) would be deported. Anton cannot return to Indonesia and live safely; furthermore, there is no way that his husband, Brian, could move there, nor any way they could safely or legally live there as a legally married gay couple. All these conditions are laid out in the administration’s prosecutorial discretion guidelines. Despite meeting these conditions, and despite the administration’s recent confirmation that those guidelines would be applied to gay and lesbian couples, Anton now faces the reality of deportation by January.

Brian and Anton's case is the first test of the administration's commitment to stop deportations involving same-sex binational couples since the August 18 announcement by DHS Secretary Janet Napolitano. It is the first time that the spouse of a gay American, with a final removal order, has requested prosecutorial discretion under the new guidelines.

“The Obama administration’s new policy has failed to protect Anton and Brian from deportation. ICE’s determination to deport Anton regardless of the new guidelines demonstrates that the administration has not instructed ICE deportation officers on the implementation of the LGBT-inclusive prosecutorial discretion guidelines for an individual with a final order of removal,” said Lavi Soloway. “Today’s decision is a devastating setback for this couple, and should be of great concern to everyone, including the Obama administration, as they work to ensure that we have a fair and humane deportation policy.”

For more information on the campaign to help couples like Brian & Anton, please see www.StopTheDeportations.com.

Press Contacts: Lavi Soloway, Lawyer/Founder, Stop the Deportations
(323) 599-6915
StopTheDeportations@gmail.com
www.StopTheDeportations.com

Justin Ward
Media Field Strategist
Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD)
(917) 727-4585
ward@glaad.org

BACKGROUND OF THIS CASE

Anton and Brian on the wedding day in June

Anton had previously exhausted all his appeals and recently received a final denial of his last appeal. Because Anton has a “final order of removal,” ICE has the power to put him on a plane and deport him at any time. The request for deferred action was his final hope for a halt to deportation.

Earlier this year, Brian and Anton faced the cruel coincidence of a deportation scheduled for Valentine’s Day. Anton, with his bags packed and his one-way plane ticket in hand, was prepared to follow ICE's instructions: board a plane voluntarily on February 14 or be taken into custody and forcibly deported, even though he knew that by boarding that plane he would be separated from Brian for at least ten years. Stop The Deportations, the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) and other LGBT groups mounted an emergency advocacy with the support of U.S. Senator Robert Casey (D-PA) and Philadelphia Congressman Robert Brady (D-PA) to raise the profile of the case and persuade ICE to reconsider the case.

Just three hours before Anton’s flight to Jakarta was scheduled to take off, ICE finally agreed to postpone the deportation. Anton was put under an Order of Supervision and was not held in ICE custody. Officially, ICE allowed Anton to stay until a final decision was made by the Board of Immigration Appeals (BIA) on a Motion to Reopen that had been filed in 2010. That Motion was denied on May 31, 2011. A request this summer that DHS join a second Motion to Reopen the case failed when DHS declined to do so. The BIA can still re-open the case on its own decision, but it rarely does so.

On June 12, Brian and Anton married in Washington, D.C., in a ceremony across the street from the White House. Brian filed a green card petition for Anton and will continue to advocate tirelessly for his right to sponsor Anton to stay with him in this country as his spouse.

STOP THE DEPORTATIONS – THE DOMA PROJECT, a campaign co-founded by attorney Lavi Soloway in July 2010 along with his law partner, Noemi Masliah, has contributed to the trend of recent victories. For nearly two decades, Soloway has been the most prominent attorney and advocate on LGBT immigration law and policy in the United States. He has worked exclusively in this field since co-founding the non-profit organization, Immigration Equality, in 1993.

Brian & Anton Face Final Deportation Decision on Oct 7 Will New Guidelines Protect This Gay Couple As Promised?

2011-09-30T09:28:00.001-07:00

Read this excellent article by Jen Coletta yesterday in the Phildelphia Gay News here and GLAAD's blog posting urging action in support of Brian and Anton here. See also, our previous summary, The First Big Test: Will The Obama Administration’s New Deportation Rules Come in Time for Brian & Anton?

Together for 8 Years and Married, Donald and Arthur Face DOMA Deportation Proceedings in Miami Tomorrow

2011-09-07T00:01:00.006-07:00

Stop the Deportations co-founder, Lavi Soloway, will appear in a Miami courtroom on Thursday September 8 to fight for the right of Donald and Arthur to remain together in this country. Arthur has lived in this country for over 16 years, and if it were not for DOMA he would already have a green card. We will make the court aware that the U.S. Department of Justice explicitly argued for the first time on September 2 in a Federal District Court filing that DOMA is unconstitutional in this context. For more information on DOJ's historic September 2 filing see here.

(Originally posted on May 10, 2011)
From Donald:

Donald and Arthur will appear in Immigration Court in Miami on September 8
for a deportation hearing. Please help us save their marriage!

Arthur and I met just after he had lost someone very important in his life. I was a shopkeeper, and later the assistant manager for a video and clothing store where Arthur shopped for music primarily. At that same time I was working part time as the secretary of The Episcopal Church of the Intercession. I have always felt that my faith has strengthened me; it has always given me great victory over my physical health challenges and allowed me to keep my mind positive.

I held and comforted Arthur many nights in order that he might find some inner peace following the abrupt loss of a great love in his life. He was nearly inconsolable in those times. We listened to so very many great songs and mixes in those days. Arthur would help me order and choose which loud dance music and which new mixes and DJs were going to be hot that year. Together, we did everything. We realized we loved the same things. It was around about the year 2002 and I was in love with Arthur. By the next year we were boyfriends.

By this time Arthur had told me he was here on a work visa and had been on various visas at various prestigious companies. I shared with him my inner need to travel some day and also told him my ultimate vacation destination was Angel Falls in Venezuela. He lit up and told me all about it. He told me he’d seen it up close. I was so envious and this seemed so much like a match made in heaven.
Continue reading here.

For the First Time, the Obama Justice Department Argues that DOMA is Unconstitutional When Applied to Binational Lesbian and Gay Couples Filing I-130 Petitions

2011-09-06T14:39:00.003-07:00

On Friday, just as most of us began to settle in for the Labor Day holiday weekend, the Department of Justice filed a brief in Federal District Court in California arguing that is a violation of the United States Constitution to deny I-130 Alien Relative Petitions filed by lesbian and gay U.S. citizens for their foreign born spouses.

The filing multiplies the ironies and cognitive dissonance of an administration that will continue to enforce DOMA against married binational couples while taking an increasingly aggressive legal and rhetorical position that DOMA is unconstitutional. The Obama Justice Department filed the brief on behalf of the following named defendants: on behalf of the named defendants: Attorney General Eric Holder, DHS Secretary Janet Napolitano, USCIS Director Alejandro Mayorkas, and the Los Angeles USCIS District Director, Jane Arellano. Essentially, Justice Department Attorneys are arguing that none of these Defendants should be enforcing DOMA because it is unconstitutional.

This is the first time the DOJ has filed a brief arguing that DOMA is unconstitutional specifically in the immigration context. DOJ filed this brief in support of a binational couple in California who are suing the federal government because their I-130 was denied on the basis that DOMA prohibits USCIS from recognizing their marriage. Essentially DOJ argues that USCIS should be approving I-130 petitions filed by same-sex couples, because to discriminate against lesbian and gay couples in this context is impermissible under the U.S. Constitution. DOJ further argued that the three decade old case of Adams v Howerton was no longer applicable precedent and that the "plenary power" of Congress to regulate immigration do not permit discrimination against married gay and lesbian binational couples.

Chris Geidner at MetroWeekly has published two articles today which are a must-read for those who have followed closely the developments since the Obama administration's February 23 refusal to defend DOMA. (See Defending DOMA, Fighting Back and DOJ Argues DOMA's Unconstitutionality Holds, Even In Immigration Context, Metro Weekly, September 6, 2011.)

While this development may have implications for couples who are appealing denials of I-130s to the Board of Immigration Appeals, or seeking to have proceedings re-opened on the basis of pending I-130s, it does not change the reality that I-130s will continue to be denied. Lesbian and gay couples who file on the basis of their marriages will continue to risk deportation, or limit their ability to qualify for other visas. We continue to urge all couples to consult with competent legal counsel with expertise in issues relating to DOMA and immigration.

Read the entire DOJ brief here.

The First Big Test: Will The Obama Administration’s New Deportation Rules Come in Time for Brian & Anton?

2011-08-30T00:01:00.003-07:00

Brian & Anton will spend the next 38 days waiting for a phone call from ICE that may never come.

For the second time this year, Anton Tanumihardja, an Indonesian citizen, and his American husband, Brian Andersen, face the terrifying prospect of a deportation that will destroy their marriage. After losing a nine-year legal battle for asylum, Anton was given a “final order of removal” that may be executed on October 7.

Although this administration recently announced a “kinder, gentler” deportation policy with “prosecutorial discretion” guidelines that include same-sex binational couples, Brian & Anton will still wait anxiously for another month to learn whether this policy will be properly applied in Anton’s case.

Brian and Anton's case will be the first real test of the administration's commitment to stop deportations involving same-sex binational couples since the August 18 announcement by DHS Secretary Janet Napolitano, promising to set-aside low-priority deportation cases. It will also give us a first opportunity to confirm whether individual ICE Deportation Officers implement the LGBT-inclusive prosecutorial discretion guidelines for an individual with a final order of removal.

Unlike the two history-making cases (Henry & Josh, Doug & Alex) in which Stop The Deportations has won “administrative closure” this year, Anton’s case is significantly further along in the legal process. Anton has exhausted all his appeals and recently received a final denial of his last appeal. Because Anton has a “final order of removal” ICE has the power to put him on a plane and deport him at any time.

Will ICE Deportations and Removals Officers apply the prosecutorial discretion guidelines to protect this married gay couple from being torn apart? As part of the Stop The Deportations campaign, Brian and Anton will use every day that remains to ensure that Anton is granted "deferred action" and to ensure that the Obama administration's commitment to same-sex binational couples facing deportation has tangible results.

Earlier this year, Brian and Anton faced the cruel coincidence of a deportation scheduled for Valentine’s Day. Anton, with his bags packed and his one-way plane ticket in hand, was prepared to follow ICE's instructions: board a plane voluntarily on February 14 or be taken into custody and forcibly deported, even though he knew that by boarding that plane he would be separated from Brian for at least ten years. Stop The Deportations, GLAAD and other LGBT groups mounted an emergency advocacy with the support of U.S. Senator Robert Casey (D-PA) and Philadelphia Congressman Robert Brady (D-PA) to raise the profile of the case and persuade ICE to reconsider the case.

Just three hours before Anton’s flight to Jakarta was scheduled to take off, ICE finally agreed to postpone the deportation. Anton was put under an order of supervision and was not held in ICE custody. At regular intervals he was required to check in with his Deportation Officer at the local Deportations and Removals Operations office of ICE. Officially, ICE allowed Anton to stay until a final decision was made by the Board of Immigration Appeals (BIA) on a Motion to Reopen that had been filed in 2010. In fact, deportations are routinely carried out even in cases where there such motions are pending, so it seemed likely that ICE was, at least in part, responding to the specific humanitarian circumstances faced by Brian and Anton. This gave them hope that they would have a future together.

Photo by Jeff Fusco/Philadelphia Weekly

Unfortunately, in early June, Anton learned that the BIA had denied his final appeal. The couple was devastated, but they decided to go forward with their planned wedding. On June 12, Brian and Anton were married in the company of friends in Lafayette Park across the street from the White House. Brian immediately filed a marriage-based I-130 petition for Anton, joining our DOMA challenge.

On August 25, Anton went to see his Deportation Officer for his first supervised check-in since the BIA denial prepared to submit a request for "deferred action." It had only been a few days since Secretary Napolitano announced that the administration would review all pending deportation cases, including those with final orders of removal. Still, Brian & Anton could not sleep the night before; they worried that ICE in Philadelphia would not know how to apply the prosecutorial discretion rules to gay couples. Their fears turned out to be well-founded. The officer was kind and co-operative, but he was not sure how to proceed given that these guidelines were new.

After conferring with his supervisor for 45 minutes, the officer returned to tell them that no decision could be made on that day. He instructed Anton to return on October 7 and advised him that there was a strong chance that on that day he would informing him that he deportation would proceed.

Once again, the clock is ticking on Brian and Anton's marriage. It does not have to be this way.


Anton & Brian on their wedding day

Anton is a prime candidate for "deferred action." He has never committed a crime, he has strong ties to Philadelphia, he has close family ties to his husband, Brian, and Brian's family. He has been here for nine years and has worked hard and paid taxes. Finally, conditions in Indonesia would make return to that country not only dangerous for Anton as a gay man who is also a member of the Chinese Christian minority, but would make it impossible for Brian to join him. Not only does Indonesia not provide for the immigration of same-sex spouses or partners of its citizens, but a conspicuous, openly gay couple like Brian and Anton would be vulnerable to abuse and harm.

Brian and Anton should not have to wait until October 7 to learn whether their lives will be torn apart. We urge the administration to make good on their promise to exercise discretion and stop deportations that tear apart LGBT families. The Department of Homeland Security can do this today by directing the Philadelphia ICE office to make a decision on Anton's request for deferred action now.

Victory for Doug and Alex! Government Drops Deportation Proceedings Against Married Gay California Couple

2011-08-20T18:15:00.010-07:00

San Francisco Immigration Judge Grants Government Motion to Close Deportation Case Against Alex Benshimol

We learned today that deportation proceedings that threatened to tear apart Alex Benshimol and Douglas Gentry, a married gay binational couple in California, have been dropped by the government. This marks the second time in which Immigration and Customs Enforcement has agreed to close a deportation case involving a married same-sex couple, and the first such case to occur pursuant to the June 17 prosecutorial discretion guidelines issued by ICE Director John Morton.

Statement from Lavi Soloway:

Alex & Doug protest outside
San Francisco Immigration Court on July 13

"For the second time this year, Immigration and Customs Enforcement has dropped deportation proceedings against a married gay binational couple who courageously fought a high profile campaign as part of the Stop The Deportations - The DOMA Project.

This demonstrates that an interim solution can be achieved for married lesbian and gay binational couples facing deportation when ICE fairly applies its own guidelines and decides not to pursue deportation. By halting this deportation, ICE prevents a marriage from being torn part by DOMA, a statute that the President and the Attorney General have determined to be unconstitutional.

On July 13, Alex Benshimol and Doug Gentry of Cathedral City, California, appeared before San Francisco Immigration Judge Marilyn Teeter for their deportation hearing. Judge Teeter instructed the government to respond within 60 days to our lengthy and detailed request for administrative closure. Judge Teeter scheduled the next hearing for September 2013, postponing deportation proceedings for more than two years in the event that the government did not agree to close the case. On August 11, the Judge received and granted the government's Motion to Administratively Close deportation proceedings against Venezuelan Alex Benshimol. We received the decision today. This effectively ends the nightmare faced by Alex and his American husband, Doug Gentry.

On August 18, Secretary Janet Napolitano announced a case-by-case review of all current and future deportation cases.

Another DOMA deportation has been stopped, following a year-long campaign by the Stop The Deportations - The DOMA Project. While we have been successful at preventing DOMA from destroying marriages, one victory at a time, we still call on the Obama administration to institute a uniform policy in the form of a moratorium on all DOMA deportations that will make these case by case determinations unnecessary.

We are cautiously optimistic after the announcement this week by Janet Napolitano, Secretary of Homeland Security, that all 300,000 pending deportation cases will be reviewed for possible closure, including those impacting LGBT families. However, we do not yet know the mechanics of that process, nor how long it will take for the government working group to carry out its mission. In the meantime, we must continue to fight for each couple and for an end to DOMA deportations across the board."

Statement from Doug Gentry and Alex Benshimol:

“Alex and I are tremendously happy with Judge Teeter’s ruling. It’s like waking up from a bad dream. We’ve spent so many sleepless nights and lived with fear and anxiety. For ICE to exercise discretion and agree to close the case is extremely encouraging. This should bring hope to so many couples in our situation. As happy as Alex is, he’s still uncertain. We will still have to fight for full equality because DOMA prevents me from petitioning for his green card. But the constant fear of exile or separation is over, and for that we’re very grateful. “

BACKGROUND

On July 13th 2011, Venezuelan native Alex Benshimol and U.S. citizen Doug Gentry stood hand-in-hand outside the federal building on Montgomery Street in San Francisco. The couple was surrounded by friends, family, advocates and supporters who came together in protest against a DOMA deportation that would destroy their marriage. Journalists and press took videos and pictures documenting the dedication of the chanting crowd, the face of 17,000 petition signers who urged the administration to take immediate action to ensure that married binational same-sex couples enjoy full equality and access to all the rights and priveleges afforded to opposite-sex binational couples under our immigration laws. The rally and petition in support of Doug & Alex was organized through the combined efforts of Stop the Deportations and Out4Immigation, GetEqual, Marriage Equality USA and many other organizations (see complete list at the bottom of this post).

Appearing before Immigration Marilyn Teeter, Soloway requested that the government exercise “prosecutorial discretion” to drop its case again Alex Benshimol. Specifically, Soloway asked that the government agree to “administrative closure,” which, if granted, would effectively end the deportation case against Alex. Soloway pointed to the June 17, 2011 memorandum from John Morton, the director of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), to ICE officers, agents, and attorneys, which specifies the guidelines for exercising prosecutorial discretion in cases that are not enforcement priorities. Soloway asked the Judge not to proceed with the deportation case until the government responded to the request.

Soloway argued that multiple guidelines in the memo applied in Alex’s case (original memo text italicized):
● Particular attention should be paid to plaintiffs in non-frivolous lawsuits involving civil rights.
Soloway argued that Alex and Doug were part of an advocacy campaign, namely, Stop the Deportations, that had filed I-130 marriage-based “green card” petitions in order to challenge the Defense of Marriage Act in pursuit of (equal) civil rights.
● Whether the person has a U.S. citizen or permanent resident spouse, child, or parent.
Soloway argued that Alex has a U.S. citizen spouse, Doug, who lawfully married Alex in Connecticut in 2010. They have been together ever since. Alex is also the stepfather to Doug’s two children who are both U.S. citizens.
● The person's ties and contributions to the community, including family relationships.
Soloway argued that Alex has strong community ties: he has a successful dog grooming business, is a well-respected member of his community, and many organizations have publicly supported his pursuit to stay in the country with his husband, Doug.
● The person's criminal history, including arrests, prior convictions, or outstanding arrest
Warrants.
Soloway noted that Alex has no criminal history, no arrests, convictions, outstanding arrests or charges.
● The person's ties to the home country and conditions in the country.
Soloway argued that Alex has no ties to his home country of Venezuela and has not lived there for 12 years. Venezuelan law makes not provision for the immigration of a same-sex spouse of a Venezuelan citizen, so if Alex were deported Doug would have no way of living in Venezuela with him. Furthermore, Soloway noted, Venezuela is not safe for LGBT people or Americans.

In response to Soloway’s request to administratively close the case, Judge Teeter laid out two options. Either the government could move to close the case within 60 days, or, Judge Teeter would revisit the case again in 27 months to settle the matter until the political landscape surrounding the Defense of Marriage Act had settled. On July 13 Doug and Alex left the courtroom relieved that the judge had given them a 26 month reprieve and optimistic that the government would drop the case altogether before September 12.

Only 16 days later, ICE notified the Immigration Judge that they would agree to close the case. The Judge received the goverment’s motion on August 11 and ruled on the Motion immediately ordering the proceedings administratively closed. Soloway received notice of the decision today.

For Doug and Alex this long ordeal is over. While they still fight for full equality, and a green card for Alex, they are safe in the knowledge that the government will not longer seek to deport Alex and destroy their marriage and the life they have built together for past six years.

Just two days ago, Janet Napolitano released a letter to Senator Harry Reid (NV-D), explaining that “the June 17th, 2011 prosecutorial discretion memorandum is being implemented to ensure that resources are uniformly focused on our highest priorities.” Secretary Napolitano specified by noting that these high priority cases are “those involving convicted felons.”

Secretary Napolitano’s letter explained that an inter-agency group had been established between the Department of Justice and the Department of Homeland Security in order to do a case-by-case review of “all individuals currently in removal proceedings, to ensure that they constitute our highest priorities.” She notes that all future cases will be viewed in the same fashion, in order to be consistent with the priorities of the two departments. Perhaps most importantly, DHS clarified that the family unification considerations outlined in the June 17 memo did include LGBT families.

What does this mean?

Secretary Napolitano's historic announcement takes us one step closer to a uniform policy that will end deportations of all spouses of lesbian and gay Americans. It puts the full power of the administration behind the enforcement of prosecutorial discretion rather than simply allowing each ICE attorney or deportation officer to decide whether and how that discretion should be exercised. By undertaking a review of all pending deportation cases at the highest level and clarifying that existing prosecutorial discretion guidelines include LGBT families, Secretary Napolitano will now have the opportunity to stop every deportation involving a lesbian or gay binational couple.

There is no question that DOMA is the sole obstacle to a green card for Alex and Doug. Alex came into the U.S. 12 years ago from Venezuela and overstayed a tourist visa, an immigration violation that straight binational couples can remedy once married. As a same-sex married couple, Doug and Alex do not have that option. Thousands of married binational couples, like Doug and Alex, are treated as legal strangers in the eyes of the federal government. Doug and Alex faced deportation proceedings for one reason only: the Defense of Marriage Act, a law President Obama has determined to be indefensible and unconstitutional and has called on the public to help repeal.

Tens of thousands of binational same-sex couples will celebrate this historic second victory following on that of Josh Vandiver & Henry Velandia in June. Again the administration has demonstrated it can prevent a married same-sex couple from being torn apart by a “DOMA deportation.” Secretary Napolitano’s announcement opens the path to further exercise of prosecutorial discretion in deportation cases, enabling same-sex married couples to stay together. However, we must continue to fight for each and every couple to ensure that no couple is separated by DOMA.

STOP THE DEPORTATIONS – THE DOMA PROJECT, a campaign co-founded by attorney, Lavi Soloway in July 2010 along with his law partner, Noemi Masliah, has contributed to the trend of recent victories. For nearly two decades, Soloway has been the most prominent attorney and advocate on LGBT immigration law and policy in the United States. He has worked exclusively in this field since co-founding the non-profit organization, Immigration Equality, in 1993.

Our July 13, 2010 rally to stop the deportation of Alex Benshimol was also supported by Asian Pacific American Legal Center (APALC), Asian Pacific Islander Equality, Asian Pacific Islander Legal Outreach, Asian Law Caucus, Central American Resource Center (CARECEN), Chinese for Affirmative Action, Equality California, Immigration Equality, Love Honor Cherish, National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR), National Immigrant Justice Center (NIJC), and San Francisco Immigrant Legal and Education Network (SFILEN).

Sujey and Violeta's Victory, Beating Back DOMA Deportation Makes Big News in Denver

2011-08-20T11:14:00.004-07:00

From left, Sujey and Violeta Pando and the Denver couple's attorney, Lavi Soloway, walk into court Friday before a federal immigration judge postponed a decision on deportation of Sujey Pando. The decision came a day after the Obama administration announced a policy change that makes cases like Sujey Pando's a low priority. The Pandos were married in Iowa in 2010.

(Karl Gehring, The Denver Post)

Complete article from Denver Post:

Shift in national immigration policy just in time for Denver woman facing deportation

By Felisa Cardona
The Denver Post
August 20, 2011

The Obama administration's sudden shift in immigration policy had a tangible impact in a Denver courtroom Friday when a federal immigration judge delayed a deportation hearing for a lesbian fighting to stay in the country with her wife.

"I feel relief, and I thank the judge because she is a human being," said Sujey Pando, who is trying to stay in the U.S. following a 2008 traffic stop that revealed her undocumented status.

Sujey Pando is one of 300,000 undocumented immigrants across the country who Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano said Thursday should begin to be considered "low priority" for deportation. Pando was facing the possibility of removal from the country, but the the immigration judge, Mimi Tsankov, postponed the hearing until January, citing Napolitano's shift.

"The judge was not comfortable moving forward with so much at stake," said Pando's attorney, Lavi Soloway.

The status of undocumented immigrants who pose no security risk and came to the country as children should be reviewed on a case-by-case basis in compelling circumstances, Napolitano said in a letter to the Senate released Thursday.

The policy change includes consideration for immigrants who have familial ties to the U.S., including lesbian and gay families.

Critics of the plan say the White House is providing back-door amnesty to undocumented immigrants and overriding Congress' authority on the issue.

Napolitano thinks easing up on those cases will let courts focus on security threats and undocumented immigrants with criminal records.

Over the next five months, prosecutors may be offered more guidance by the government as to how to proceed with Pando's case.

Prosecutors could decide to allow Pando to live in the U.S. under certain conditions and drop the case against her, Soloway said.

Pando's mother and stepfather brought her from Chihuahua, Mexico, into the U.S. when she was 16 and promptly kicked her out when she revealed she is a lesbian.

Her mother, who has permanent residency status, obtained citizenship for her three sons, but not her daughter, because she is gay.

In 2010, Pando, 34, traveled to Iowa so she could legally marry her longtime girlfriend Violeta Pando, a 27-year-old U.S. citizen. They live in Denver.

Sujey Pando works as a restaurant service manager, and Violeta Pando is a correctional case manager for felony offenders.

In November 2008, Sujey Pando forgot to use her turn signal while driving in Adams County, and police pulled her over. She didn't have a valid driver's license, and she didn't lie to the officer about her status.

The police called Immigration and Customs Enforcement to pick her up, and she was jailed for 3 1/2 months.

"I was scared to go into that kind of facility because I am not used to that kind of life," she said.

Violeta Pando says her government should be protecting her marriage instead of trying to destroy it.

"If I was straight they would be helping me keep her here," she said. "I do feel relief today, and I am happy our marriage was being recognized a little bit at least."

Victory for Sujey and Violeta Pando! Judge Halts Deportation, Sets January Date to Consider Application Based on Their Marriage

2011-08-19T15:23:00.002-07:00

Lavi Soloway: "Today Denver Immigration Judge Mimi Tsankov halted the deportation of Sujey Pando and scheduled a new hearing to consider an application based on her marriage to her U.S. citizen wife, Violeta Pando. Because today's hearing was intended to be a final decision day on Sujey's deportation, the judge's action was unusual; she spent 45 minutes methodically considering the procedural posture of the case. In the end, the Judge set aside the intended purpose of the hearing, citing developments including the Attorney General's intervention in a similar case in May (Matter of Dorman) and noted that the issues involved in this case existed in a context that was "fluid" and "in a state of flux." The Judge referred to events that occurred as recent as yesterday as having an impact on how to proceed. Yesterday, the DHS Secretary Napolitano ordered a review of all pending deportation cases for possible closure, including those involving LGBT families."

Sign Our Petition To Stop The Deportation of Sujey Pando

2011-08-16T06:51:00.000-07:00

On August 19th in Denver, Violeta and Sujey Pando will face the worst nightmare for any lesbian or gay binational couple: a final deportation hearing in an Immigration Court. They are legally married, but Violeta, a U.S. citizen, cannot sponsor her spouse, Sujey, who is from Mexico, because of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). In fact, because of DOMA, this loving, committed couple of five years, who married last year in Iowa, may be torn apart by a judge’s order next Friday if action is not taken to prevent it from happening.

The President has said that DOMA is unconstitutional and has endorsed its repeal. The President must immediately direct the Department of Homeland Security to halt all deportation of spouses of lesbian and gay American citizens to prevent DOMA from destroying marriages. If Sujey Pando is deported she will be barred from returning to the U.S. for ten years.

None of this would be happening to an opposite-sex couple in the same situation.

Urge President Obama, Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano, and Attorney General Eric Holder to take action: exercise prosecutorial discretion, respect Violeta and Sujey's marriage, and prevent this married lesbian couple from being torn apart.

Sign our petition to the President and send a message that we need immediate executive branch action to protect all lesbian and gay binational couples.

To help Sujey and Violeta further:

Follow STOP THE DEPORTATIONS: The DOMA Project for further updates
Call your elected officials to urge them to help couples like Violeta & Sujey Pando before Sujey's final hearing on August 19th
U.S. Representative Diana DeGette: 202.225.4431, Denver 303.844.4988
U.S. Senator Michael Bennet: 202.224.5852, Denver 303.455.7600
U.S. Senator Mark Udall: 202.224.5941, Denver 303.650.7820
Share our petition urging the officials to halt DOMA deportations. To share this petition via email, facebook, or twitter, use the buttons below.

Violeta & Sujey's Fight Against DOMA Deportation Featured in Out Front Colorado

2011-08-12T11:13:00.002-07:00

Read the complete article here. Read the Violeta and Sujey's story in their own words here.

Sign this petition to President Obama asking him to halt the deportation of Sujey Pando and all spouses of lesbian and gay Americans.

Violeta and Sujey: Married, Lesbian Couple Fights DOMA Deportation in Denver, Final Hearing on August 19

2011-08-03T19:38:00.000-07:00

My name is Violeta. I am a 27 year old American citizen. I live in Denver, Colorado where I was born. I hold a degree in Criminal Justice and work as a Correctional Case Manager. My wife, Sujey, and I, are one of the many same-sex couples who are threatened with being torn apart because of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). Because of DOMA, I cannot pursue the most obvious solution which would be to petition for her as my spouse; instead we are fighting for asylum due to her past experiences of extreme harm that she suffered in Mexico and her fear of returning there. All our hopes are on this asylum application--a long, difficult and painful struggle for Sujey, who has had to re-live traumatic incidents of physical and sexual assaults--but there is no guarantee that it will be granted. What is so obvious, is that we should never have had to fight in this way at all. We have been together for almost 5 years as a couple and we are married. No American citizen should have to beg for protection for her spouse; the right to sponsor my spouse for a "green card" should be automatic for me as it is for all other American citizens.

On August 19th, an Immigration Judge in Denver will decide whether Sujey will be deported from the United States. This fact puts our life, our marriage, and our family into a state of complete chaos. Sujey has lived in the United States since she was brought here as a teenager, and she is fully a part of my family as any spouse can be. Why does my government insist on enforcing this unconstitutional law against me? If Sujey is deported she will be barred from the United States for ten years. TEN YEARS. There are no words to describe the anguish we feel as the days countdown to August 19th. We hope and pray for a miracle.

I met Sujey on November 2, 2006 at a gay club named El Protrero and from that day on we have never been apart. We had our first date the next day. Sujey was very supportive of me while I attended school and put in long hours studying. She would stay up late with me as I tried to get my homework done and would help me study and read my term papers. I loved her immediately. Two months later, Sujey and I moved in with each other; we were spending so much time with each other, our relationship was getting serious, and it made no sense to be paying two monthly rents. Our pets got along great, too. We quickly became one big a happy family. Together we now have 4 dogs, Honey, Briza, Akira and Rocko and 2 cats, Kissie and Soulen. We also have a red tail Boa, her name is Destiny.

I love Sujey with all my heart. I knew when we started dating that I had found true love for the first time in my life. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. We were engaged for two years, our plans for our wedding were still taking place at the time Sujey was picked up by immigration. Even though we knew that the federal government doesn't recognize the marriages of same-sex couples, we knew just as strongly that we wanted to marry and move forward with our lives together as a family. As an engagement promise, we got tattoos with each other's names. We planned for two years to get married in one of the states where marriage was legal for a same-sex couples. Finally the day came. Sujey and I married November 15, 2010 in Iowa. It was the happiest day of our lives.

Sujey and Violeta on their wedding day in Iowa, November 15, 2010

I learned of Sujey’s abusive childhood early in our relationship. Sujey has many personal issues due to all of her trauma, so there were times when we had to sit down and talk about things. I learned that Sujey was given away by her mother a few months after her birth and that Sujey was raised by her grandmother. And in her grandmother's care, Sujey was the victim of extreme cruelty and abuse because she was a "tom boy." One family member in particular was determined to show her "how to be a girl" and raped her repeatedly. No one could protect Sujey. Even the Mexican authorities refused to intervene.

As a little girl, Sujey loved sports. At school, however, she was often in too much pain from her abuse to play sports which would result in dismissal from class. At home, Sujey would get in trouble for being dismissed and would get beaten up by her uncle. Sujey has lasting physical injuries resulting from the physical and sexual abuse she suffered growing up in Mexico. Her history makes me want to cry when she talks about it, but I can’t cry in order to support her, I have to be strong and be as optimistic as possible. Some days it is very difficult to keep a positive attitude. I can see the fear in her eyes, sometimes she thinks that her tormentor will come to the United States to look for her. I have to calm her down and reassure that I am here for her and that she is safe.

Once, when she was 16, Sujey was thrown out of her house in Mexico and was forced to hide at a neighbor's house for a few days. Desparate, she decided to call her mother, who by then resided in the United States. Her mother was married, but had never told her husband that she had left a daughter behind in Mexico. On the phone, Sujey's mother refused to help her, but her mother's husband intervened, to his credit, and forced Sujey's mother to go to Mexico to get her. And that is how Sujey was brought to the United States, where for the first time she met her three American-born brothers. Her feeling of safety lasted only a short time. A few months after Sujey was brought to the U.S., her mother discovered that Sujey was gay and threw her out into the street. Even though her mother was a green card holder she refused to sponsor Sujey. Sujey was left to fend for herself and find a way to survive in the United States without any support.

In November of 2008 Sujey got pulled over for a routine traffic violation and was taken to jail. There, Immigration and Customs Enforcement was notified and she was placed into deportation proceedings. We have been fighting to stay here ever since. I went with her to her mother's home to beg for her help but she refused to help Sujey because she was gay. We are scared for our lives and our future if Sujey is deported.

It is a shameful and sad reality that this country officially discriminates against lesbian and gay Americans by denying recognition of our marriages. We are second-class citizens at best. Denying that our love and our families are of the same value, denying us the same respect and the same legal protection simply because we are gay is unAmerican. We cannot be a country that cherishes equality, as long as our laws enforce this cruel discrimination against me. My government is so powerful that it can come into my home and drag my wife off to be deported, treating me like nothing more than a legal stranger.

I have been placed in a position where I have to choose between my country and my wife. If my wife gets deported and I choose my country, I would be left without my wife. If I leave to Mexico with her, I am left without my country. To keep my marriage intact I am being forced out of my own country. If Sujey is deported then I will be deported too, because I will not leave her side. She is my wife and I will be there for her to protect her and make sure she is safe with my last breath. The reality is that we have no way of surviving in Mexico. I don’t know what we will do. I should not have to be exiled from my own country because I am a gay woman. I am an American citizen. This should not be happening.

We have joined the Stop The Deportations campaign to help make others aware of the humanitarian crisis that binational gay couples face, even when we are married. We need your help to stop this deportation from happening. We are reaching out to our two U.S. Senators Michael Bennet and Mark Udall and our Representative Diana DeGette to ask them to call on the administration to stop this deportation. We ask everyone who is reading this to help us by calling those elected officials and urging them to take action to save our marriage and stop this deportation.

SAVE THE MARRIAGE OF VIOLETA & SUJEY PANDO:

CALL ON THE DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY
TO STOP ALL DEPORTATIONS OF SPOUSES OF LESBIAN AND GAY AMERICANS

U.S. Representative Diana DeGette: (202) 225-4431    Denver (303) 844-4988
U.S. Senator Michael Bennet: (202) 224-5852    Denver (303) 455-7600
U.S. Senator Mark Udall: 202-224-5941    Denver (303) 650-7820

Raúl gets his Wings: U.S. Embassy Grants Tourist Visa to Travel with Brad from Ecuador to the US in August

2011-08-02T07:02:00.001-07:00

Raúl and Brad

A happy update from Brad, from Cuenca, Ecuador.

For many gay Americans with a partner abroad, obtaining a visitor's visa can be an elusive and frustrating process. Just spending a few weeks together in the United States can start to seem like one of life's most daunting challenges. Most applicants for visitor visas in developing world countries have virtually no chance of approval unless they are from the most affluent echelon of society. LGBT applicants, who may have fewer "country ties" than most (no spouse and children to anchor them to their own country, for example), often have even lower chance of success. If the Consular Officials know that the purpose of the trip is to visit a same-sex partner, that could be enough reason to deny the application since that may suggest a strong likelihood that the applicant will stay in the U.S. These were the enormous odds that Brad and Raúl were up against as the fate of their visitor visa application was in the hands of the U.S. Consulate in Guayaquil, Ecuador.

We’ve all heard the story about that Peace Corps volunteer who goes off and spends two years working alongside community members in a developing country. Before he returns home, he meets the love of his life and before you know it, they’re on a plane to start a life of opportunities together in the U.S.

Unfortunately, that’s not quite how the narrative works for a good number of same-sex couples who fall in love abroad, be it in Peace Corps or otherwise.

I met my partner, Raúl, in August 2009, half way through my Peace Corps service in Ecuador. Not much longer after that we started dating. We were an unlikely couple to start, being of different nationalities, languages, education levels, and socio-economic status, among other differences. However, what we lacked in a common background, we made up for in patience, caring, and clear communication. Throughout the ups and downs of my final year of service, Raúl and I grew as a loving couple. July 29, 2010, my close of service, came much too soon. My plan was to leave the country to seek employment and apply to graduate programs in psychology in the U.S.

Brad's grandparents who will soon
celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary
with Brad and Raúl present

Still, we had hope that Raúl could at least visit my family and me for Christmas, further strengthening our relationship and allowing us to make plans for the future. A month and a half after my departure from Ecuador, Raúl applied for a visitor visa and his interview with the US Consulate in Guayaquil. Unfortunately, we were rather naïve about the application, thinking that our relationship would be a helpful factor in his application when in reality it was a hindrance. Once it was known Raúl’s partner was an American living in the U.S. that constituted an important factor for the Consular Officer who assesses each applicant's presumed immigration intent. Raúl had other deficiencies that would doom most Ecuadoreans from obtaining visitor visas to the U.S., such as his relative lack of savings and lack of strong connections (like a wife and children, or property ownership) in his native Ecuador. As a result, Raúl’s application was rejected without much consideration from the consular official.

It was a heartbreaking moment for both of us and we shared it with The DOMA Project on this site earlier this year. I still remember being in Chicago’s Union Station hearing Raúl cry over the phone after his unsuccessful interview. Never had I felt so powerless. That day, I decided that if Raúl could not visit me and my family in the US, I would return to Ecuador.

So, I did return—much to the disappointment of my family and friends back home. Together, we bought a café/bar aptly named “Black and White.” Starting a business was far from easy given that neither of us had any experience in opening one, much less while holding a 40+ hour/week day job. Fourteen hour days were not uncommon. In spite of the stress of working our day jobs and running Black and White, we were eventually able to make our small business profitable.

After a couple of months together, we decided we would try again for a visitor’s visa. I knew that my grandparents would be celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary in August and while I was still in the US, my grandmother invited both me and Raúl to join the family for this momentous occasion. After consulting extensively with Lavi Soloway at The DOMA Project, we began working on Raúl’s new application. This time around we took a much more comprehensive approach and did our homework with Lavi Soloway's guidance. Between my day and night jobs, I did my best to motivate myself to work on writing and collecting affidavits from family members back home; documenting an offer to post a bond to guarantee Raúl’s return if a visa was granted; completing the DS-160 form; compiling financial records and business records from our business, Black and White; purchasing round-trip plane tickets; acquiring an invitation to present on Ecuadorian crafts; and collecting any other information that might convince a consular officer that the purpose of Raúl’s visit was specific, discrete and temporary.

Thankfully, in addition to collecting all the evidence that would overcome the Consular Officials presumption of immigrant intent, we were able to secure a Class B Referral from a member of the US Peace Corps Mission in Ecuador. Also, following Lavi Soloway's suggestion that we reach out to our elected officials, we were able to get a letter sent from Congressman Bruce Braley’s office to the US Consulate, requesting that the Consulate give a thorough consideration of Raúl’s application.

After months of hard work, anxiety, exhaustion and tears, and several pro bono Skype consultations with Lavi Soloway, the application was ready. On the day of Raúl’s interview, June 27th, 2011, we were both extremely nervous, knowing that since he had been denied the year before, the outcome of this application was extremely uncertain. It was hard to permit ourselves to get too optimistic. Even with all the evidence we were able to compile, we both knew it was more likely than not that his application would once again be rejected.

Much to our surprise, Raúl beat the odds. The friendly consular officer in Raúl’s interview took the time to understand the unique circumstances surrounding his application to visit the United States. She noted that Raúl’s purpose in visiting the U.S. was to attend my grandparents' 50th wedding anniversary. She had statements from my grandparents and my parents in the file, with all the other evidence. Upon the conclusion of Raúl’s interview, the consular officer informed him that he would be granted a visa to accompany me on a visit to my family in the U.S. When Raúl told me over the phone of the outcome, I was overwhelmed by feelings of joy, disbelief, anxiety, and vindication from the past year; I can’t well describe just how I felt. All I could do in that moment was cry. Even now, I get teary-eyed writing about this. Most importantly, I felt that for the first time my government had validated my effort to be treated equally and with respect by knowingly permitting a gay man from Ecuador to travel to the U.S. to spend time with the family of his American boyfriend. I was grateful that the Consular Officer believed Raúl when he said his intention was only to make a short visit and that he would return to Ecuador as promised. The Consular Officer required Raúl to physically return to the consulate after the trip to prove that he had come back. This suprised us, but it also reminded us how incredibly difficult it is for an unmarried man, with limited financial means and few ties to his own country to obtain such a visa at all.

Raúl once told me that he was born without wings to fly—that is, the ability to accompany me to the U.S. Today, thanks to many people including my parents, grandparents, Lavi Soloway, Representative Braley, the Director of Peace Corps/Ecuador, the US Consulate in Guayaquil and many others who offered either advice or a listening ear, Raúl now has his wings. He now will have the privilege to meet my family as I have had the privilege to meet his. We are most grateful to all for this opportunity.

Because Raúl’s visa is a visitor’s visa, it is temporary. He must and will return to Ecuador. All the same, visa renewal requires another application and further uncertainty. As with bi-national same-sex couples residing in the US, we exiled couples must also learn to overcome uncertainty, separation, and expiration dates. This unfair burden for same-sex couples must be resolved so that future couples like Raúl and me have a fighting chance.

Regardless of what may happen after Raúl’s visit, we will keep fighting for our relationship. We hope that Raúl’s wings won’t be clipped once he returns to Ecuador.

See also, "From Iowa to Ecuador: Peace Corps Volunteer Falls in Love, U.S. Denies His Partner a Visa," and "Exiled in Ecuador, Brad & Raúl Try to Plan for a Future Together." The Iowa Independent ran this article about their plight.

Last fall Brad wrote a moving essay for the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender U.S. Peace Corps Alumni, titled, "Back Home: How Peace Corps/Ecuador Changed Me," in which he describes his experiences in that country and his coming out to his grandmother back home in the rural midwest.

Johnny & Sebastian: Binational Couple Among First to Marry in New York, DOMA Means They Are Still Unequal

2011-08-01T03:00:00.002-07:00

Sebastian and Johnny after marrying in Manhattan on June 24, 2011

There's no doubt that Sunday June 24, 2011 will go down in history as a triumphant day for LGBT Americans. As the media descended on New York to report the first marriages of lesbian and gay couples taking place by the hundreds from Niagara Falls to Manhattan, it was hard not to have an emotional reaction, no matter how far we were from the action. What began courageously at Stonewall 44 years ago has once again brought us closer to reality in one of the most populous states in the country.

However, as important as this milestone is for New Yorkers and for the cause of equality nationally, the goal of Marriage Equality cannot be achieved until all marriages are recognized by the federal government. As long as couples like Johnny and Sebastian are viewed as nothing more than strangers under federal law, they will be deprived of more than 1,100 benefits, obligations and protections that are available for all other married couples. And until the Defense of Marriage Act has been repealed or struck down, Johnny will be prevented from petitioning for a "green card" for his husband.

As we celebrate the joyous occasion of the marriages of loving, committed lesbian and gay couples we will redouble our resolve to stop the deportations, separations and exile of all lesbian and gay binational couples.

Below, native New Yorker, Johnny Lee, shares with us the experience of marrying his German-born, fiancé, Sebastian Barleben, on the momentous first day of marriage equality.

Sebastian and I had already spoken at length before deciding to get married that morning. Although he tends to be private and even a bit standoffish by nature, the opportunity to participate in this watershed moment outweighed his usual reluctance to be in the spotlight. And besides, we were already engaged. We were in the midst of planning the wedding of our dreams (and we still are) when history just happened. We decided we wanted to be a part of it.

For me, that Sunday morning at the City Clerk's office in downtown Manhattan can best be summed up as a blur of intense emotions. From the moment we arrived outside the heavily fenced in government building at 6:30 a.m., we could feel the excitement in the air. Not even the extreme heat could dampen the significance of what was about to happen. A few early arriving couples milled about and television crews began setting up their cameras; but the protesters and police who would soon show up where still nowhere to be seen. We started to meet other couples, including two men who had been together for 30+ years. It was both humbling and inspiring to stand with couples who had made such lasting commitments to each other but who had been denied the opportunity to marry until this day. We knew we were benefiting from decades of hard work by brave visionaries who probably had more faith than we did that this day would happen. What made it so special was the sense that we were a part of a collective celebration that everyone in attendance seemed to acknowledge had not come easily. We felt privileged and overwhelmed. We bonded with perfect strangers because we all had one thing in common, the one thing that brought us downtown on that sweltering day: love.

The crowd on Worth Street swelled very quickly with couples, family, friends & supporters, along with press and police. A handful of protesters were chanting something hateful from across the street, but they were drowned out by cheers coming from hoards of volunteers and random well-wishers who shielded and embraced us with rainbow colored umbrellas. It was amazing to see how many people showed up simply to support us and to congratulate hundreds of couples they didn't even know. Sebastian and I were moved by their genuine joy.   Sebastian and I were among the first couples brought inside the City Clerk's office at 8:30 a.m. We were quickly processed by one of the clerks who carefully went over the details of our license application and then ushered us into a small room where we were greeted by more press and by the Honorable Judge George Silver.

As Judge Silver spoke, everything suddenly became still. Despite all the commotion that was brewing outside, all I could hear was the sound of the Judge's voice. He took a moment to recognize the importance of the occasion and shared that he too was in awe of what was happening in the state of New York that day. His words hit a nerve, and I couldn't help but tear up from all the anticipation that had been welling up inside me that morning.   Judge Silver concluded his remarks and pronounced us legally married, Sebastian and I kissed and walked outside the Clerk's office hand in hand. As we waited for our license to be printed, I suddenly couldn't help but feel a little bittersweet about our moment. Yes, being legally married in the State of New York was momentous for both of us; and yes, I was overwhelmed with joy; but, having lived in Manhattan for most of my life, I had to remind myself that the wondrous spirit of my own city on this day did not mirror the state of affairs for gay couples in most of the rest of the country. In so many places, gay couples like Sebastian and me, have struggled for years in the fight for marriage equality and are still far from reaching their goal. New York took a big leap forward on July 24, but 44 states still discriminate against lesbian and gay couples in marriage. We must keep up the fight so that everyone can experience the joy we felt that day.

Johnny and Sebastian in
New York Magazine

And that, of course, brings me to the most difficult part of celebrating our marriage that day. As we stepped out of the building to the cheering crowds, we knew that the offensively-named "Defense of Marriage Act" still prevented us from feeling truly equal. Our marriage is denied recognition by the federal government, a fact that seems so obviously unconstitutional and unAmerican, but also has a direct impact on us because it prevents me sponsoring Sebastian for a green card as my spouse. Although we are fortunate for now that Sebastian is able to remain in the United States because of his employment-based visa, we also know there are tens of thousands of other gay and lesbian binational couples who do not have this luxury. It saddened me to think that despite having reached this amazing milestone, there was still a long road ahead to finish the job. Nevertheless, the events of last Sunday were surreal and unforgettable. The sense of love and community that emanated from that place left us speechless and feeling more than blessed. We set forth as a married couple to play whatever part we can to make sure that all couples can stay together, have full legal recognition of their marriages and to make a better world in which the Defense of Marriage Act is no longer.

Sebastian and Johnny share the video made of their experience marrying on the first day of Marriage Equality in New York.

Josh Vandiver & Henry Velandia and Courage Campaign Ask Senator Robert Menendez to Support DOMA Repeal

2011-07-28T09:34:00.002-07:00

Josh and Henry photographed in May in New Jersey's Liberty State Park (Jonathan Ystad/GetEqual)

Today Josh and Henry teamed up with Courage Campaign launching an effort to persuade their United States Senator Robert Menendez to join 29 other member of the Senate and become a co-sponsor of the DOMA repeal bill, the Respect for Marriage Act. Josh and Henry point out in their letter to the Senator that DOMA is tearing apart married gay and lesbian binational couples. Senator Menendez is an ally of the LGBT community and is the co-author of the comprehensive immigration reform bill currently pending in the Senate that includes a provision that would allow for the immigration of partners of lesbian and gay Americans and permanent residents, however he has not joined the fight for repeal of DOMA. Last week the President formally endorsed the Respect for Marriage Act and the Senate Judiciary Committee held its historic DOMA repeal hearing. It is time for every supporter of LGBT equality to stand up and fight for repeal of DOMA. Call Senator Menendez at 202-224-4744 and tell him about the hardship caused to you by DOMA.

Dear Senator Menendez,

We write as a married same-sex couple on behalf of ourselves and many other New Jersey families who are being denied equality, out of concern over a particular piece of legislation.

Sen. Feinstein has introduced S. 598, the Respect for Marriage Act, which would repeal the odious “Defense of Marriage Act,” or DOMA. We know you are a supporter of equality for same-sex couples, Sen. Menendez. What’s more, as the lead sponsor of comprehensive immigration reform legislation that includes the Uniting American Families Act, you know that ending DOMA would eliminate the discrimination in immigration law that nearly forced Henry's deportation, even though we are legally married.

It is therefore with surprise that we learned you are not one of the 29 Senators who publicly support the Respect for Marriage Act. As you know, Senator, this issue would permit the tens of thousands of same-sex couples -- many of whom live in New Jersey -- to have access to the over 1,100 federal rights and benefits to which heterosexual couples are entitled. These include Social Security benefits, health insurance, immigration benefits, tax provisions, and more. These benefits would strengthen New Jersey families by providing tools that help loving, committed couples and their families to take care of each other. What’s more, if the Respect for Marriage Act becomes law, this recognition would not stop when couples cross state lines -- the lawful relationships of loving, committed same-sex couples could be recognized in all 50 states.

Through our Stop The Deportations project we've joined with other same-sex bi-national couples who are being denied immigration benefits due to DOMA. Many are facing the nightmare of deportation and separation because of DOMA. We hope it's an oversight that you have not yet joined your colleague Sen. Lautenberg in co-sponsoring the Respect for Marriage Act, Sen. Menendez. We, along with supporters of equality across the country, look forward to your prompt reply.

With respect,

Josh Vandiver and Henry Velandia
Princeton, NJ

SF Chronicle: DOMA Enforcement is Changing, With DOMA Deportation Cases Leading the Way

2011-07-26T18:32:00.002-07:00

Read the full article here.

Almost 30 Years After They First Met, Lin & Martha Continue to Fight for Couples Exiled to the DOMA Diaspora

2011-07-25T00:01:00.001-07:00

Living Into a Fair Future
By Lin McDevitt-Pugh

This is a story about Martha and me. Martha went into exile in 2000 when two important and incompatible facts dominated our lives. We were in love and realized we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. Martha could not stay in the United States because US immigration law prohibited her from sponsoring me as her permanent partner to live there with her.

Martha and I live in the Netherlands. For the past 13 years we have been confronted with the fact that, in this time of globalization in which people often partner with those of different nationalities than their own, the United States does not allow its citizens to sponsor their same-sex partners for immigration purposes.

For the past 9 years Martha and I have actively worked to change this cruel law while she lives in exile. It is time for change. The US immigration law hurts us, hurts Martha’s family, hurts the thousands of families like ours, and it hurts the United States and the freedom it stands for. We think love can change the abject law that keeps Martha in exile. Martha needs to be able to go home and bring me, her wife of 10 years, with her. This is the story of who we are, our love for each other, and never giving up on our dreams.

When Martha and I fell in love we had been friends for 17 years.
***
Martha and I met in February 1982. I was working in an international media office in Amsterdam with people who promoted clean energy. I had a monthly journal to type but my colleagues were banging out a bi-weekly news release on our one-and-only machine. So I traveled across town to another non-profit, an international policy studies center, to see if I could use one their electric typewriters.

I arrived at the office and a young intern from the USA was typing away; she kindly moved to another chair and watched as I laboured through my pages of copy. When I came back next day to finish the job, I learned that, when she arrived in Amsterdam to start her internship, a co-worker gave her a list of names of people she should try to meet. Coincidentally, my name was at the top.

That is how Martha McDevitt and I met and became fast friends.

When my girlfriend of the time gave birth to our son, Koen, Martha adored him. Martha, a highly competent seamstress, created one little jumpsuit after another for Koen and frequently babysat for us.

In 1984, Martha met an American service woman stationed in the UK who was visiting Amsterdam for R&R where she would not have to hide her sexuality. My family began celebrating holidays with Martha and her partner. In 1990, when Martha’s girlfriend left the military, the couple returned to the USA. Martha knew she would miss us but she wanted to be near her family and wanted to develop a career in her own country. She gave me a modem to put in my computer, so that we could email each other and keep in touch that way. I cried for 6 months. I missed my best buddy.

Fortunately, Martha found that her knowledge of Dutch and her computer skills were very much in demand in Silicon Valley. She was able to secure work that regularly brought her back to the Netherlands and I had work that occasionally took me to the East Coast of the United States; from there, I’d fly to San Francisco to visit her. In this way, we managed to maintain a close and precious friendship.

The friendship was easy and did not have any of the thorns and brambles we experienced with our lovers. My relationship faced constant turbulence despite the best will in the world. When our son was 12, my partner and I decided to disengage. Martha’s relationship, too, had encountered its own turbulence. We both concluded that relationships and turbulence went together, and easy companionship was a thing of friendship.

That changed the week of Martha’s 40th birthday when I visited her in California. By that point, Martha was a senior manager in a Silicon Valley firm and had separated from her girlfriend. It was during that visit that I recognized that what I felt was more than friendship. But with more than 16 years of ease and pleasure as friends on the line, my voice was barely more than a hoarse whisper when I asked her if she wanted to risk more. After what seemed many seconds, I forced my eyes to lift and to look at her. I encountered her smiling face, that beautiful face I had known and enjoyed for so many years. Yes, she wanted that too.

Sigh. This is the stuff of a fairy tale, or shall we say the kind of fairy tale I wish I was told when I was a child. Those kinds of fairy tales hadn’t yet been invented about two women with different nationalities, living on different continents, who fall in love.

And the fairy tale ending still has not been invented. Once we acknowledged we were in love, the confrontations with reality started. To begin with, we had to think about where in the world we would live. Literally. We had three places we could be with family. While I am a Dutch citizen, I am Australian by birth and am privileged to have two living parents in Australia. Martha was living near San Francisco, close to her family, and loving it. And my son Koen was 16 and living in Amsterdam. I certainly did not want to leave him before he was an adult.

For more than a year, from 1999 to 2000, Martha or I flew over the ocean at least once every 6 weeks to spend time together. When we weren’t together we spoke every day on the phone and we had a constant stream of emails. Martha knew it would be very difficult for me to move to the United States as immigration law only recognized heterosexual married couples.

But we had each other and a strong commitment to fairness. We knew that it was our right to be together because we believed – and continue to believe – that we all have a right to equality under the law. We believe that most people will agree with us if they let their hearts speak.

Still, going back and forth between two continents quickly lost its shine. In 2000, Martha found a job in the Netherlands and moved to join me there, 18 years after we first met. In May 2001 we married under the new Dutch law, one month after it was introduced. Having the right to choose to marry, we experienced what it was like to be first class citizens, with all the rights and responsibilities my brother and sister and Martha’s siblings experience in their own country. We don’t feel different, we are not legally different, we are simply people who choose to form a primary relationship with each other and have that relationship recognized by the State. We chose marriage. We wanted to stand up in front of friends and family and request that they support our relationship through thick and thin. We wanted to exercise our right to form that most essential cornerstone of society, the family. We experience the joy of our marriage every day of our lives.

The distinguished photographer Gon Buurman took photos at our wedding for use beyond our own living room wall. We were thinking about the power of the image to support the growing number of voices in the United States saying that two people loving each other should be able to celebrate that in the way that is customary in any society: through marriage. The photos have appeared in magazines and newspapers, on websites and in books. They have even been in art exhibitions, street exhibitions and an exhibition at a retirement home. We have been interviewed for more than 5 books and have talked about the where, what, how and why of our wedding in filmed interviews and in mainstream magazines in the 10 years since.

Martha even spent time on our honeymoon writing about these issues for a gay publication in the USA. We were astounded when the editor wrote back asking if we were sure the marriage was legal. His question was a distressing reminder that in United States it can be hard for even gay people to imagine legal equality.

But our marriage was legal and very real: from the veils and the bouquets to the flower girls, page boy, and the exchange of rings; from the kiss and the champagne on the steps of the City Hall to the celebrations afterward with family and friends from Australia and the USA, from Germany and the UK, and of course from the Netherlands. We were sung to, had poems written about us, we danced the night through and we celebrated life and love.

After several months, though, the reality of our situation began to weigh on Martha. She was living back in the Netherlands, somewhere she had never planned to return. Her dreams of living in her own country, with her family, building her career, were smashed. She had not voluntarily left the USA to be with me; she was exiled. Exiled for love. And because she knew that she was not the only one, in 2002 Martha founded the organization “Love Exiles” to be a community of people who could support each other in exile and who could work together, and with organizations in the USA, to put a halt to the unnecessarily cruel law that made it impossible for people to live in the United States with their foreign-born loved ones and spouses. We set up a board, with Janherman Veenker, a Dutchman whose partner of 20 years, James, was a dean at Rutgers University; Bob Bragar, a New York lawyer who had fallen in love with Rik , a judge in the Dutch law courts; Robby Checkoway, a US-born journalist living in the Netherlands with his UK partner Chris who ran a flourishing internet company; attorney Kirsten Anderson who had fallen in love with Dutch policewoman Jacqueline; and Martha and myself. Our first action was to organize a Thanksgiving dinner at which the Love Exiles living in the Netherlands treated representatives of the local community, including a mayor and a prominent politician responsible for opening marriage to same sex couples, to one of the USA’s finest eating traditions. A lawyer in Los Angeles knew we were organizing the event and he put his client, Tim Heymans in London, in touch with Martha. Love Exiles UK was born. Shortly after, when we were filming a film about love exiles in Germany, Love Exiles Germany was born. Then came Love Exiles Canada and Love Exiles Australia, all of them online communities sharing information on how to cope in a foreign land, how to let their elected representatives know about their situation and how to work toward changes in the law. None of us have come to terms with the fact that the USA would prefer to lose their citizens to exile rather than accepting their partners as residents.

In 2004 Martha joined an 8-day bus ride across the United States organized by marriage equality activists on the West Coast. Their aim was to travel through the heartland educating people along the way about why the freedom to marry matters. Martha kept an audio-log throughout the ride which was later broadcast on Radio Nederland and won a major media award.

A year later, in 2005, Martha was sitting at home in Amsterdam watching developments in California. An exciting majority of the state legislators had voted to open marriage to same sex couples. Would Governor Schwarzenegger veto the bill that would allow couples of the same sex to marry? With our rights hanging in the balance, Martha decided to book a flight home to try to be of help. Within days she was in Redwood City near San Francisco with her mother, preparing a two-day bike ride to the California capital of Sacramento. She bought a new road bike, contacted local marriage and immigration equality activists and set off early one morning to the flash of TV cameras on a journey that brought her to the Governor’s office.

I made a t-shirt for her to wear, with our wedding photo on it. I love the photo that was taken of her wearing it and standing under the portrait of the Governor and his wife. She didn’t get to see the Governor. She left a message. The governor vetoed the bill, saying the courts and not the legislators had to decide.

When Martha was in the States, my job was to inform the press. Alone on the other side of the world, at least I was in an advantageous time zone to get out press releases in support of the efforts of our friends from Out 4Immigration and to publicize the ride. The story of Martha’s ride to Sacramento was one of the top 10 stories of 2005 according to the Dutch magazine, Zij aan Zij.

There are many more stories I could tell about our ongoing efforts to expose the discriminatory effects of US immigration law and the negative impact those laws have on the ability of US companies to employ gay Americans who have foreign partners.

I really admire the efforts of my wife, Martha. Every day, she is thinking and talking and writing about a future in which our families will not face discrimination. She is fearless and at the same time sunny, funny and a treat to be with. One day she will have the right to live in the same country as her mother, her sister and her brothers, the country in which she was born – and to do so without having to leave me, her spouse, behind. We deserve that simple but critical right.

Monica & Cristina Take DOMA Deportation Fight to Board of Immigration Appeals, Challenging a 29-Year Old Precedent

2011-07-22T18:57:00.001-07:00

MSNBC: Binational Couples Fighting for Full Marriage Equality and for the Right to Stay In the U.S.

2011-07-22T17:21:00.003-07:00

See full article here.

Gay City News: After Halting Deportation, Josh Vandiver & Henry Velandia Continue the Fight Against DOMA

2011-07-22T13:20:00.002-07:00

See original article here.

Monica & Cristina Fight for Their Marriage at the Board of Immigration Appeals, As NYC Celebrates Marriage Equality

2011-07-20T19:45:00.000-07:00

U.S. Embassy in Sydney Denies Christopher's Request to Visit Arthur, Enforcing 10-Year Bar With No Mercy

2011-07-20T03:00:00.001-07:00

Christopher and Arthur fight a technicality that keeps them apart, despite their 14-year relationship

An update from Christopher Joseph whose heart-breaking story of a 10,000 mile separation from his partner, Arthur, was posted here on April 10, 2011. Christopher and Arthur met and fell in love in the United States 14 years ago, but following incorrect advice from an attorney, Christopher departed the U.S. to return to Australia after having overstayed his visa by 13 months. As he later learned, this meant that he would be barred from returning to the U.S. for 10 year, or until 2019. Each year, countless lesbian and gay binational couples are separated by the 5 or 10 year overstay bars. Christopher has been trying to get back to the U.S. begging elected officials and Consular officers for help. All his efforts, as he notes below, have failed.

From Christopher:

It seems our quest for a path to return to the United States has failed on all accounts. While I have been here in Australia I have sought help through the US Consulate without success. Their response has been that it didn't matter why I overstayed my visa; even though I may not have been at fault, the ten year entry ban would be enforced with no chance for any appeal. The Consulate Officer was quite belligerent in writing, so much so that it felt that they were enjoying denying me any help. Meanwhile Arthur had been getting assistance with a representative of Marriage Equality who arranged a meeting with our U.S. Senator back home; but again, no success. The Senator would not call the Consulate on our behalf even though his staff indicated to us that he believed he was supportive of our plight. All other avenues have fallen flat and we have been left staring at locked doors. We have one final act seeking help with another Senator but judging by past efforts, we don't hold much chance of anything positive coming forth.

We are devoted to each other and our love for one another will not perish even though it seems we cannot spend our lives together. As I said in my letter to our Senator, I spent 33 years of meeting people and not finding my Mr. Right until I found my Arthur and he found me. I believed love was never going to find me but it did and no lawmaker, cetainly those who have never met us but yet still believe they can decide our fate, will ever keep us from the love we share. Arthur has spoken about coming to Australia, a country that doesn't allow same sex marriage but does allow same sex partner immigration. In that sense the U.S. could learn a few things from what other countries are doing. American politicians tell the world that "all men are created equal" and generously uses the word "freedom" as though it is something they can export by example. That is far from the truth as far as we are concerned. Arthur has a stable home and family life in the U.S. and I would never want to break that up. We both live in hope that one day soon, those who make these laws decide to change them and we would never want anybody to go throught the pain we now have to endure. Whether or not this is survivable only time will tell. At the moment I don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I believe the tunnel end is a rock wall.

Without the Defense of Marriage Act we would actually have a chance to overcome this 10-year bar. Arthur and I could marry (we'd have to fly to a third country to do it, like Canada) and then apply for me to immigrate to the U.S. Through that process, I could apply for a waiver on the basis of my marriage to a U.S. citizen, if I could prove that it would cause extreme hardship to Arthur if I were unable to immigrate before 2019. Knowing the hardship we have experienced for the past two years, I hardly think it would be difficult to explain that concept to Consular Officer. Of course none of this should have ever happened. If we had married in 2009 and Arthur had been able to petition for a "green card" for me, my story would have been just as simple and straightforward as that of any straight binational couple. DOMA caused this disaster, perhaps these are its unintended consequences, who knows? It doesn't matter. There are many lesbian and gay couples whose lives have been ruined because of DOMA and the 10-year bar on returning. A broken immigration system and a cruel, discriminatory anti-gay marriage law have caused so much sorrow.

If by chance you are a law maker and are reading this, we both hope you never have to be apart from those you love and who love you. Your decisions, or lack thereof, are destroying true families and you are destroying love. The agony we feel is so far the worst feeling we have ever encountered. In some ways, losing a loved one may be an easier thing to deal with for there is closure. With Arthur and I, all I do is wonder how he is and how hard it is when he needs my help.

DOMA needs to end. We need to have full equality, dignity and respect for all LGBT families. Foot dragging by any politician on this issue means more families torn apart, more lives destroyed and continued second-class citizenship for all lesbian and gay Americans.

Video: Stop The Deportations Rally Across From San Francisco Immigration In Support of Doug & Alex

2011-07-18T21:20:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Sean Chapin for putting together this video montage of our July 13 rally. The result was a big victory for Doug and Alex.

Becky & Sanne: Ten Trips, a Wedding and a Daughter. Exiled Binational Couple Finds a New Life in Belgium.

2011-07-18T03:00:00.001-07:00

My Union is Sacred

One moment has the power to last a lifetime and change the course of a life. September 30th, 2008. I was in Northern India leading a group of young adults on an alternative educational journey. She was there on an art internship. We had both—me, with the group and her solo—registered with an Ashram where we would attend an intensive 8-day yoga course. Introductory evening: she is called Sanne. She comes from the Netherlands. I am Becky; I come from America. We are certain…Our gazes open doors to places that have no borders. The world is small, but the heavens not.

It is India, so we are cautious. Though it is hard to hide what seems to be bursting forth with such gusto and intent. One of my students says to me, in a hushed tone, just three days after Sanne and I meet, “Becky, it seems like you are in love.” It’s true. I am—deeply and in ways I had only dreamed of.

Eighteen days later, Sanne and I part. My group is off to another part of India. Sanne is making her way south to Mumbai, her point of exit back to the Netherlands. We have no idea when we will see each other again. I tell her I will find my way back to her.

December 2008 - Trip One

I am in between groups, but I must see her. I squeeze sixteen days in the Netherlands. I feel I have known Sanne forever. Her family feels like my own.

March 2009 - Trip Two

I have finished my stint in Guatemala with the next group. Sanne is rooted to her place in the Netherlands as she finishes art school. Even though I know her, I want to get to know her. I have a little less than two and a half months left on my tourist visa for this six-month period. We learn what life is like on a daily level. Again, we are certain; we want to build a life together. I go back to America in May just biding my time until we can reunite. My life feels empty there without her.

June 2009 - Trip Three

I have just seven days left as a “tourist.” I stay exactly the alotted time in order to attend Sanne’s art exhibition and graduation.

July 2009 - Trip Four

It’s Sanne’s turn to be a “tourist.” It is much more difficult for her to come to America than it was for me in the Netherlands. Americans are suspicious: of everyone. Her grandma deposits a lump of money into her account, so she can show that she has enough to stay for the maximum six months. We make some semblance of a life for ourselves in Milwaukee where my twin sister resides. We know this arrangement will be short-lived, and we must come up with a plan if we are to remain together. In the meantime, I have one of those dreams that I know can only be my soul speaking. I am meant to carry a child in Africa. Again, for a fleeting moment, our world is borderless.

January 2010 - Trip Five

This time, together, Sanne and I make the trip to the Netherlands. Now, we feel like partners. We are indeed partnering in our life. We intend to keep it this way. It’s a logistical trip as a result. How can we create a life with one another unbound by visa requirements?

February 2010 - Trip Six

Together, we have made our second trip. We are in Ghana now following our passions: Sanne is learning woodcraft from a local artist, and I am writing. We are both birthing something in ourselves before we take on the conception and birthing of our child. It’s a simple life in form, but complicated in relations. Sanne and I are relegated to tales of us being “real, good friends.” Wink Wink. Of course, we knew that coming into this. Same sex relationships are illegal in Ghana. You can even serve prison time.

May 2010- Trip Seven

A soul has chosen us. I am certain we are pregnant. Now, residency is imperative. Sanne has returned early to arrange details for my immigration. It will be difficult, but not impossible. Thank God the Netherlands recognizes my partnership. We are so blessed that we can create a life together in one of our countries.

June 2010 - Trip Eight

I am back in the Netherlands. Those four weeks apart felt like an eternity. I just wanted to share this pregnancy with Sanne. We inform our families of our life, our plans. We will marry in September. We already know that ours is a Sacred Union that can’t be touched or influenced by anything outside of ourselves, but we want rights, too.

July 2010 - Trip Nine

I have to leave again, otherwise the paperwork can’t be arranged in time to avoid “tourist”status. With my belly in bloom, I return to America to be amidst family and friends. My community is there. It’s bittersweet, really. I’ve found my life partner and so much is being created, but I must also leave so much behind. I feel heartache and love operating simultaneously. Sanne and I both know we would stay in North Carolina if we could. We both feel a connection to the mountains there and the people. One day, we think.

August 2010 - Trip Ten. The Last.

I am back. Things are becoming clearer, even if they are still tricky. To Belgium, we must go. Immigration law is less stringent there. We have concluded that immigration in the Netherlands is for people with money. In Belgium, you need less of it.

September 20, 2010. We marry almost two years, to the date, of our meeting. It’s simple. It’s sweet. It affirms what we have already commited to with one another. It feels different though, carries with it different implications. We are seen as a couple now— by the law and by immigration officials— a luxury not afforded to us back in the United States because of the Defense of Marriage Act, which defines marriage as a Union between a man and a woman.

Since we are talking about marriage here, I’ll be candid…I never imagined I would get married, at least not in the traditional sense. I had always envisioned some kind of commitment ceremony where friends and family would witness my partner and I sharing vows that we created— vows of conciousness and empowerment. Marriage, in my eyes, was the formality. It still is. Indeed, when Sanne and I got married, everything felt different. We had, after all, stated our vows (still our creation) in front of others. There’s power in that. But there is also power in having our Union recognized by our government. Especially now that immigration is dependent on it.

So, the paperwork is in order. We begin our life together. We find a home in the literal sense. In its figurative sense, we have learned that home is inside of us. But, we are realizing, with each passing day, there is something more to “home.” It’s not unlike a relationship in that way. Sometimes there is but one place (or in terms of a relationship, but one person) that really stirs something deep in our beings. A place (or person) that calls forth the bigger and brighter aspects of who we are because it just FEELS right. To Sanne and I, that place is the mountains of North Carolina. There’s a resonance we feel there that we haven’t known anywhere else. And now, as caretakers of our daughter, Willow, we have an even bigger responsibility to live where our hearts and souls desire. We are models for her of what it means to live life.

So Sanne and I are doing it. We are living life. We are listening closely, and we are placing our hearts out there— our story— with the knowledge that, just as our neighbors, we are humans with an equal desire to love and be loved. We don’t wish to meddle in politics or religion or the lives of others, for that matter. We are not activists. We are people, and all we desire is the freedom to be who we are, to live our life as a family, and in the place that feels home to our souls.

Together, let us work to repeal the Defense of Marriage Act. It only serves to reinforce the isolation and division too many of us— no matter the race, gender, creed, or sexual orientation— feel in our insides. Support Unity: family unity. Support Love. Support Life. Let our higher selves be the model we choose and live by— if not for ourselves than, at least, for our Gods and our children.

Thank you for listening. If you feel compelled, share this story: with like-minded folk or differing-minded folk. It doesn’t matter. It is all of our journeys, after all, to be fully who we are. I am called Becky. She is Sanne. Our daughter is Willow.

Stop The Deportations Teams Up With Lambda Legal: Fighting DOMA at the Board of Immigration Appeals

2011-07-15T18:55:00.002-07:00

Lambda Legal Files Amicus Brief To Urge Immigration Officials to Stop DOMA Deportation of Monica Alcota, and All Same-Sex Binational Couples

Cristina Ojeda and Monica Alcota

On July 11, Lambda Legal Defense joined the fight to stop the government from tearing apart Cristina Ojeda and Monica Alcota, a married, binational lesbian couple in Queens, New York. The nation's oldest and most respected LGBT legal organization filed a friend-of-the-court brief at the Board of Immigration Appeals after the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) denied the couple's marriage-based immigration petition.

Cristina and Monica have fought a high-profile battle against the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and deportation proceedings since joining the Stop The Deportations campaign last summer.

In March, New York Immigration Judge Terry Bain, acting with the agreement of the Immigration & Customs Enforcement prosecuting attorney, postponed Monica's deportation hearing on the basis that Cristina had filed a marriage-based "green card" petition for her. Monica and Cristina are scheduled to return to court in December for another hearing to review the status of that petition.

In April, USCIS denied Cristina's "green card" petition for Monica, citing DOMA and also relying on a 1982 decision known as Adams v. Howerton from California's Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals. (That case involved a gay binational couple, Anthony "Tony" Sullivan and Richard Adams, who had fought and lost a legal battle against the then-INS. In 1996, Lavi Soloway wrote this article about the couple and their fight on the occasion of their 25th anniversary. Tony and Richard recently celebrated their 40th anniversary and are still fighting for equality and justice for binational couples.)

Cristina appealed the denial of her petition to the Board of Immigration Appeals (BIA). The lawyers for the couple, Stop The Deportations co-founders, Lavi Soloway and Noemi Masliah, filed a brief arguing that the BIA should not affirm the denial considering that the Department of Justice, of which the BIA is a part, has itself determined that DOMA is unconstitutional. The brief argued that the BIA should hold the case in abeyance, given the rapidly evolving legal context, specifically the DOJ's filing of a 31-page brief against DOMA and in support of the plaintiff in the Golinski case on July 1; the DOJ's decision to allow married same-sex couples to be recognized as married in U.S. Bankruptcy Court proceedings on July 7; and the Attorney General's historic intervention in a BIA decision on May 5 that suggested the DOJ was considering whether "partners" in civil unions could be recognized as spouses for immigration law purposes.

Lambda’s amicus brief to the BIA argues that immigration officials are attempting to incorrectly apply the findings of the Adams v Howerton case to find a reason to deport Monica Alcota.

Lambda is coming to Monica’s defense with a brief that argues that Adams v Howerton has been superseded by multiple intersecting legal and legislative developments since 1982. Many modern recent developments for same-sex couples have occurred since 1982, including the rise of jurisdictions where marriages and civil unions between same-sex couples are recognized to be lawful, and where pending federal litigation are challenging the constitutionality of the Defense of Marriage Act.

Despite the obvious inapplicability of Adams v Howerton, USCIS continues to tear apart same-sex binational couples in situations similar to that of Cristina and Monica, ignoring their marriages. While Immigration and Bankruptcy Courts across the nation are showing flexibility in dealing with married same-sex couples, USCIS, which is part of the Department of Homeland Security, seems unwilling to entertain that option.

Lambda’s urged the immigration officials to exercise prosecutorial discretion to administratively close or postpone all pending immigration cases involving married same-sex couples, at least until DOMA is either repealed, or declared unconstitutional. Absent DOMA, there would be no obstacle to the approval of the marriage-based "green card" petition filed by Cristina for Monica. Tens of thousands of lesbian and gay Americans would have equal access to the family unification provisions of U.S. immigration law, just like all married couples.

See Lambda's complete press release and the amicus brief filed in support of Cristina Ojeda and Monica Alcota here.

Victory for Doug & Alex! San Francisco Immigration Judge Postpones Deportation Hearing for More Than Two Years

2011-07-13T11:33:00.003-07:00

Alex and Doug attend rally this morning on Montgomery Street
across from San Francisco Immigration Court

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: July 13, 2011

Media contact: Justin Page/Lavi Soloway at StopTheDeportations@gmail.com or 925-408-0662

Immigration Judge Postpones DOMA Deportation Proceedings For Two Years, Allowing Married Gay Binational Couple to Remain in U.S.; Directs Government Attorneys To Act on Request for Termination of Deportation Proceedings Within Sixty Days

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – This morning in San Francisco, Doug Gentry and Alex Benshimol -- a married binational same-sex couple -- appeared before Immigration Judge Marilyn Teeter for a deportation hearing and were permitted to remain in the country despite the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), the law that prohibits the recognition of same-sex marriages by the federal government. This is the latest in a series of recent court rulings that have demonstrated the inequality that DOMA forces same-sex couples to live under.

Specifically, the judge laid out two options. She gave the government 60 days to decide whether it will agree to drop deportation proceedings against Alex -- a Venezuelan citizen -- altogether. If the government elects not to drop proceedings, the same judge will revisit the case again in September 2013, ensuring that Doug and Alex are protected from deportation for at least two more years allowing them to return to building a life together with their family, including Alex's two step-children.

"Today the Immigration Judge demonstrated compassion and understanding for Doug and Alex as a married binational couple, granting them a reprieve from deportation by postponing further proceedings to September 2013," said Lavi Soloway, lawyer for Doug and Alex, and founder of Stop the Deportations. "The Judge also gave the government 60 days to inform the court whether it will agree with our request to terminate these proceedings pursuant to prosecutorial discretion guidelines issued June 17 by Immigration and Customs Enforcement Director John Morton. We will continue to advocate for termination of these proceedings and a moratorium on all deportations of spouses of lesbian and gay Americans."

"Today's victory is yet another sign that when we engage the system and demand full equality we encourage those in power to find reasonable interim solutions that protect LGBT families, even as we fight to bring about an end to DOMA. Doug and Alex showed tremendous courage standing up for all binational couples as they insisted on fighting for an end to the government's deportation proceedings against Alex. After the hearing the couple went for a celebratory lunch. The couple looked forward to spending time with their extended family including Doug's two children who have always considered Alex to be their step-father, even before he and Doug married last year. They are very relieved to have been given a two year reprieve and they will continue to fight for an end to DOMA deportations, Soloway said."

Alex came into the U.S. 12 years ago from Venezuela and overstayed a tourist visa, an immigration violation that straight binational couples can easily remedy once married; as a gay married couple, Doug and Alex do not have that option. Many binational couples are legally married like Alex and Doug, but they are still treated as legal strangers in the eyes of the federal government. There is only one reason Doug and Alex faced deportation proceedings at all — the Defense of Marriage Act, a law that the President and the Attorney General have both determined to be indefensible and unconstitutional.

To support the couple and to show widespread public support for their right to remain together, legally, in the United States, many organizations working for full federal equality for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) Americans will hold a rally outside the courthouse in San Francisco where the hearing is scheduled to take place. Organizations leading the rally efforts include GetEQUAL, Marriage Equality USA, Out4Immigration, and Stop the Deportations.

These organizations launched a petition drive last week to show public support for Doug and Alex, garnering close to 17,000 signatures of individuals who are supportive of assigning all the same rights and responsibilities to binational same-sex couples as to binational heterosexual couples.

Organizations supportive of the couple and the rally include API Equality, API Legal Outreach, Asian Law Caucus. Asian Pacific American Legal Center, Central American Resource Center, Chinese For Affirmative Action, Equality California, Immigration Equality, Love Honor Cherish, National Center For Lesbian Rights, National Immigration Justice Center, San Francisco Immigrant Legal And Education Network, and the San Francisco LGBT Center.

Representatives Mike Honda (D-CA) and Zoe Lofgren (D-CA) have also been actively supportive of the couple, and provided written statements that were read at the rally. Rep. Lofgren's statement included a passionate plea for binational families, including the excerpt below:

"Legally-married couples are being torn apart today in America because our laws unconstitutionally discriminate against same-sex marriages. Each and every day, American spouses are being forced to make unacceptable choices: live their lives separated from one another by thousands of miles, abandon their lives in this country and move someplace else, or break the law and go into hiding. This is a heartbreaking situation all across the United States. I believe the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) is unconstitutional and that the government should respect legally-married same-sex couples. I am confident that DOMA one day will not be law. The whole country will look back and understand it was simply discrimination."

Speakers at the rally included Bevan Dufty (Supervisor), Phil Ting (Assessor/Recorder), Vincent Pan (CFAA), Ross Mirkarimi (Supervisor), Lavi Soloway (Attorney for Doug & Alex), Heidi Li (APILO), Ming Wong (NCLR), Ana Perez (CARECEN), Annette Wong (SFILEN), Dusty Araujo (NIJC), and Judy Rickard (Author, “Torn Apart: United By Love Divided By Law”).

Join us! Rally for Doug & Alex Wednesday July 13, 7:30 am San Francisco Immigration Court, Stop DOMA Deportation

2011-07-12T23:17:00.001-07:00

For more information see this Facebook event page. Sign our petition to stop this deportation here.

Stop The DOMA Deportation of My Brother-In-Law: California Family Fights to Keep Doug & Alex Together

2011-07-11T21:58:00.000-07:00

A letter from Cecily McDonald about the fight to keep her brother, Doug, and his Venezuelan-born husband, Alex, together in this country.

Doug and Alex on their Wedding Day in July 2010

The Fourth of July has just passed, but for my family it doesn’t mean the same thing anymore. As I sat and listened to the patriotic songs playing while we watched fireworks at the high school where 2 of my 3 sons have graduated, I was saddened. Our family is not enjoying the freedom depicted in those songs. Instead, we have a heavy cloud hanging over us because two members of our family are not free to enjoy the freedom and equality that our country celebrates on this holiday. Those two people are my brother, Doug, and his husband, my brother-in-law, Alex.

Most of our family first met Alex on Thanksgiving 2005. Like other American families, we traditionally celebrate the holidays with the extended family and we are often joined by friends who aren’t able to be with their own. Since that day we have all grown to love and admire him for many reasons. But now the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) is threatening to take him away from us all.

My brother Doug and Alex are now married, but because they are a gay couple, Alex is in imminent danger of deportation to Venezuela. This is only because their marriage and their 6-year relationship is not being respected as all other marriages are under federal immigration law. This inequality means Doug & Alex will be torn apart unless something is done very soon to save their marriage. That is something very hard to understand and extremely upsetting in many ways. Because of DOMA our family has become painfully aware that “all men are created equal” really means “only some men are created equal.” How can this be happening to all of us? I kept wondering that on the Fourth of July as we sat there surrounded by people waving our country’s flag and applauding the show.

Let me try to explain why this is hurting our family. For me, Alex is another brother. Growing up it was only Doug and me, though I wished I had another brother or a sister. When Alex became part of our family in 2005, we bonded quickly just as though we had always been siblings. Now I get to love, tease, talk to, and laugh with Alex and he gives it all right back. My sons are lucky, too. With Alex, they have another uncle who loves them, gives them advice, and gets firm with them when they need it. Although they are grown now, they still recognize that Alex's wisdom and experience are valid and come from a place of love and respect for them as his nephews. The same goes for Doug's children, my niece Katrina and my nephew Kenneth. No surprise that they are sometimes spoiled by their Uncle Alex, but he does a good job of keeping it all in balance.

To give you an idea of how close-knit our extended family is, even my mother-in law Evelyn is close to Alex with whom she shares a love of cooking and gardening. She enjoys our Christmas celebrations at their completely decorated home so much, saying it’s like a fairyland and she can’t imagine how we would ever be able to do it as well ourselves. My husband Randy enjoys having another brother-in-law and says he doesn’t know how anything would be the same if we have to lose Alex. My other brother-in-law, Wayne and his partner (who is also named Wayne) Alex shares music, do-it-yourself projects, and love of food.

When I think of how Alex has become central to our family, the hardest part is remembering how important he became to my late father, David. When my mother passed away in 1994, my parents had been happily married for 42 years. When his own health started declining, dad still wanted to be as independent as possible so Doug and Alex found him an apartment close to where they lived at the time. With Doug often traveling for work, Alex was there whenever dad needed any assistance, needed to be accompanied to medical appointments, help with groceries, re-filling prescriptions, or even to have a light bulb changed. Dad adored Alex, and Alex certainly cared for him as though he was his own father. Dad was so grateful for Alex's generous spirit; Alex could always get him laughing and feeling better. Many times dad said to me how much it meant to him that Alex made Doug so happy and was such a wonderful person.

Even after my father's death in March 2008, Alex's compassion was central to our family's ability to cope with ou loss. Alex kept us all going, helped to clear out his apartment, and supported us all through our shared grief till we could regain some balance.

Alex and his step-daughter, Katie

Alex and Doug built a successful pet grooming business, which was the direct result of the long hours that Alex worked and his careful skill. Over the years, this business employed my nephew Kenneth and his girlfriend Jordan who were unable to find jobs in the depressed job market in California. Kenneth was grateful to his stepfather, Alex, not only for the job but also because it gave them a chance to strengthen their already close bond.

Of course, if Alex is deported the person most directly impacted will be my brother, Doug. What on earth is he to do if that happens? Even if Doug could leave the United States and move to Venezuela to live with Alex (which is not possible under Venezuelan law), Doug will be leaving behind his only sister (me), his children, his nephews, his career, his business, and his lifelong friends. If he stays, he loses his loving husband and partner in life to whom he has committed "to death do us part." Doug and Alex are a happy, loving couple: an example of what marriage should be. I cannot even imagine their life if this deportation is carried out: does Doug fly back & forth to visit his own husband and hope the Venezuelan government doesn’t refuse him entry or exit? Venezuela can be a dangerous unfriendly place for anyone known as a homosexual. Does Doug put himself at risk as a gay man and as an American by traveling to that country? Do they face a separation of 10 years? What married couple could survive that separation? How could our extended family's love and support ever be enough for Doug & Alex if our government tears them apart only because it refuses to recognizes their marriage?

Our love for Alex has no limit. Alex shares the language, customs and upbringing of his youth with us and spares no effort at celebrating the holidays and birthdays in our family. He is generous to a fault. He is a wonderful guy to be around and anyone who is around him is better for it. None of us who know him can imagine what it would be like to live without Alex if he is deported.

The federal government is tearing apart this American family: my middle aged sibling will lose his spouse, and we all stand with him, including my senior citizen mother-in-law; my husband, his brother and his brother's partner; my grown sons (Alex's nephews); and my niece and nephews (Alex's stepchildren).

As a family we are committed to fighting DOMA and stopping this deportation.

Nothing is more American than standing up for freedom and equality. The Fourth of July and what it stands for will remain forever changed for my entire family and myself until DOMA has been repealed or struck down and all DOMA deportations have stopped.

Join Doug & Alex and their many supporters who will protest Alex's deportation on Wednesday July 13 at 7:30 a.m. at San Francisco Immigration Court (120 Montgomery Street). For more information see this Facebook event page.

PROTEST DOMA DEPORTATION! Save Doug & Alex's Marriage, Rally at San Francisco Immigration Court July 13

2011-07-09T12:21:00.000-07:00

GetEqual, Marriage Equality USA, Out4Immigration, Immigration Equality & Stop The Deportations Join Forces: Keep Doug & Alex From Being Torn Apart by DOMA

2011-07-08T06:22:00.006-07:00

Check out GetEqual's website, sign our petition to the President and learn more about our protest scheduled for 7:30 a.m. on July 13 in front of the San Francisco Immigration Court. Other organizations that have signed on to this action include Love, Honor, Cherish, National Center for Lesbian Rights and Equality California.

Doug & Alex Face DOMA Deportation in Six Days! Help Stop The Obama Administration From Tearing Apart This Family

2011-07-06T22:26:00.000-07:00

Read "California Couple Fights Deportation," by the Bay Area Reporter.

Sign our petition to help us stop this DOMA deportation.

CNN Interviews Josh & Henry About Their Historic Victory After ICE Closed Deportation Proceedings in June

2011-07-06T15:43:00.000-07:00

Good News For Rodrigo & Edwin: Baltimore Immigration Judge Re-Opens Proceedings, Cancelling Order of Removal

2011-07-05T15:31:00.007-07:00

Earlier this year, in a cliff-hanger, Rodrigo Martinez was almost taken into custody and deported to El Salvador. Now, in the first case of its kind involving a married binational couple, an Immigration Judge has reversed her own deportation order in order to give both the DHS and the couple an opportunity to achieve a just outcome, and explicitly to focus on DOMA-related immigration issues. Never before has a binational couple won the re-opening of proceedings on the initiative of an Immigration Judge to address a DOMA deportation.

Edwin and Rodrigo, on vacation this week with their family in Delaware, celebrated the news
that the Order of Deportation against Rodrigo had been cancelled by the Immigration Judge

Rodrigo Martinez and Edwin Echegoyen, a married binational couple, have been fighting for the simple right to live together in this country since 2002. After years of battling the system and exhausting all appeals, they lost. Rodrigo was ordered deported. Determined to stay together, Rodrigo did not leave the U.S. and the couple continued to fight. They knew that one day the Immigration and Customs Enforcement officers would come looking for Rodrigo, but they were not willing to give up, even against such overwhelming odds.

Finally in mid-February 2011, it happened. DHS notified Edwin that they planned to deport Rodrigo by March 9. Rodrigo and Edwin immediately contacted Stop The Deportations and joined our campaign. Then, on February 23, the President and Attorney General announced that they would no longer defend DOMA because they had determined that it was unconstitutional. After 8 years together, Rodrigo and Edwin married on March 1 and demanded that the U.S. government respect their marriage by putting any deportation action against Rodrigo on hold. This effort was temporarily successful at stopping the physical deportation of Rodrigo on March 9 and it paved the way for the major development detailed below that brings new hope to this couple that their battle to stay together might finally be over.

Today we can share with you the news that Baltimore Immigration Judge Lisa Dornell has ordered that Rodrigo's case be re-opened. In doing so, the judge has canceled the deportation order that had been entered against him in November 2008. Instead he will return to court on September 12, 2011 for re-opened proceedings.

Judge Dornell, who had ordered Rodrigo deported in 2008, has now decided, on her own accord, that it is "in the interest of justice" to re-open proceedings and to give Rodrigo another opportunity to win protection from deportation. Specifically, Judge Dornell has re-opened proceedings (1) to determine whether Rodrigo is eligible for protection from deportation because of country conditions in El Salvador for gay men and (2) to determine the relevance, to this case, of any change in policy or law impacting married gay binational couples with pending green card petitions.

In a footnote the Judge also advised the parties to be prepared to address the DOMA immigration issues

Because Rodrigo was ordered deported in 2008, this action by the Immigration Judge is a tremendous victory. This is the first time that efforts by Stop The Deportations have succeeded in reversing a final order of removal and re-opening proceedings.

Brief History of This Case

Last March Edwin Echegoyen was ordered to surrender his husband, Rodrigo Martinez, to the Department of Homeland Security on March 9, so that they could execute an outstanding final Removal Order against him. Edwin was facing certain deportation to El Salvador. As readers of this blog may recall, we stopped that deportation with a multi-pronged advocacy campaign focusing on Maryland's two U.S. Senators and the couple's represenative in Congresss, Chris Von Hollen. We also reached out to the Deportation and Removal Branch and gave them ample opportunity to review the facts of this case. Edwin and Rodrigo have been together for 8 years. Days after the President announced that he would no longer defend DOMA because he had determined that it was unconstitutional, Edwin and Rodrigo traveled to Washington DC from their house is in a suburban Maryland county, and married across the street from the D.C. Superior Court. Edwin immediately filed a "green card" petition for Rodrigo on the basis of their marriage. We worked to persuade the Deportation and Removal Branch in Baltimore to rescind the Surrender Notice, but failed. DHS required that Rodrigo surrender and would not tell us in advance how they would decide this case. The media was tremendously helpful in bringing to a wider audience the plight of a married binational couple bring torn apart by a DOMA deportation. Rodrigo and Edwin went to the Federal Building that morning with a local television news crew and none of us knew whether he would be permitted to leave or if he would be taken into custody. We were all able to breathe a sigh of relief and celebrate another small victory when Rodrigo emerged safely, given the right to stay in the United States with an order of supervision. We filed a Motion to Reopen proceedings on the basis of worsening conditions in El Salvador for gay men, and on the basis that circumstances had changed because of his marriage to his U.S. citizen husband, Edwin.

On March 7, the same Immigration Judge ordered a "stay of removal" temporarily preventing the Department of Homeland Security from carrying out the existing "final removal order." Now, almost four months later, the Immigration Judge has wiped that existing final removal order from the books. Rodrigo was ordered deported in 2008, but this move effectively cancels that order, and replaces it with new proceedings and a new day in court that will allow Rodrigo and Edwin to continue the fight for full equality and work with Immigration and Customs Enforcement attorneys to achieve the outcome that best protects them in the short term.

Coming on the heels of Josh and Henry's victory last week, this news is cause for celebration. It involves a far more complicated procedural posture than our previous cases and the unprecedented action by the Immigration Judge to reverse herself by re-opening the case demonstrates that fighting DOMA in Immigration Court and in the court of public opinion is yielding important incremental victories on the way to full equality.

Join us in congratulating Rodrigo and Edwin as they now look forward to finally putting this entire matter to rest beginning with a status hearing on September 12, 2011.

Chris Geidner writing at Metro Weekly reports on today's news and draws connections between developments for binational married couples fighting DOMA and the administration's surprise 31-page filing against DOMA (and against Congress's own attorneys) in support of the plaintiff in the Golinski case on Friday. See: "Interest of Justice" Leads Immigration Judge To Reopen Case, Ask About "Same-Sex Spouses" and Visas.

CNN en Español Interviews Josh & Henry About Their Historic Victory After ICE Closes Deportation Proceedings

2011-07-03T11:29:00.002-07:00

Link to this interview on CNN en Español here.

New York Times DOMA Editorial Highlights Josh & Henry's Victory and Inequality Imposed On Lesbian & Gay Couples

2011-07-03T08:06:00.001-07:00

One year after we launched the Stop The Deportations campaign, the New York Times publishes this editorial calling the Defense of Marriage Act "most overtly discriminatory laws in the nation's history."

Watch: MSNBC's Thomas Roberts Interviews Josh & Henry About Their Historic Victory Ending DOMA Deportation

2011-07-02T15:20:00.002-07:00

This interview originally aired June 30 when Thomas Roberts invited Josh Vandiver & Henry Velandia back into the MSNBC studio to discuss their historic victory after Immigration and Customs Enforcement agreed to close deportation proceedings against Henry. Josh and Henry were previously interviewed by Thomas Roberts on April 28 and on May 9. (h/t Equality Matters)

HISTORIC VICTORY: Immigration & Customs Enforcement Closes Deportation Proceedings Against Henry Velandia

2011-06-29T18:52:00.004-07:00

Josh and Henry have led the fight to stop the deportations of spouses of lesbian and gay American citizens

Read our press release here.

Link to this article here.

(Photo: Jonathan Ystad)

"Don’t Deport My Stepfather," 26-Year-Old Kenneth Gentry Fights to Keep His Family from Being Torn Apart by DOMA

2011-06-28T16:35:00.000-07:00


Alex, Kenneth and Doug recently participated in the NOH8 campaign

In my short 26 years of life I don’t think I ever imagined I’d be writing to my elected officials and to the President of the United States to beg them to stop a deportation that will tear apart my family. I’m a Californian, born and raised, originally from Santa Monica but now living in the desert near Palm Springs. I am extraordinarily lucky to have the most loving and caring mother and father (who despite being divorced are close friends) and, now that my father has re-married, an incredible stepfather, Alex Benshimol. Although my dad and Alex married last year, Alex has been an indispensible part of my life and our family ever since he and my dad started dating six years ago.

You might say that we are the typical American family: we stick together in hard times, we celebrate our holidays and life’s milestones together. The love that we share for each other is boundless. Most of all, everyone in my family loves Alex unconditionally. My mom loves him as though he was her sibling; my aunt Cecily loves him and treated him as a brother-in-law even in the years before my Dad and Alex traveled to Connecticut to “tie the knot.” My sister, of course, also loves Alex; for both of us it is a blessing to have a mom and two dads who love and care for us in a way that is inspiring.

It never occurred to me that anything could come along that would be so strong, so powerful and so cruel that it would destroy our family. And yet that is what is about to happen to us. (Read more about the July 13 Deportation Hearing and sign our petition here.)

The extended Gentry-Benshimol family is now faced with something we were never prepared for—a family member is being ripped away from us. And what’s more, it is my own government that is pursuing this deportation because it refuses to recognize the marriage between my father and Alex.

If you asked me how special Alex is to me, I’m a little speechless: after all, how can I describe in simple words how much I love a person who is an immediate family member? Perhaps not every stepfather is as close to his step children as Alex is to me and my sister. But I would not hesitate for a moment to consider Alex not only to be part of my nuclear family, but also one of the most important people in my life.

For more than half a decade he has been the everyday stepfather that I can come to for literally anything. I've lived with Alex and my father, in their home, and I have seen their incredible bond, the love they share. I have seen the relationship they have built and the life they have created. I have seen them share that love with our extended family and become an integral part of our lives as a couple. I can’t even imagine what life would be like if they are torn apart.

Ever since the first day we met five years ago, Alex has treated me as though I was his son and has helped me in every circumstance to get through life’s challenges with love and guidance. Shortly after they started dating, Alex saw that my girlfriend and I were struggling financially and he offered us a job to help us make ends meet. It was the first time in a very long time that both my girlfriend and I had been employed simultaneously. By both of us had steady employment, our relationship blossomed, and we are both extraordinarily thankful even now because of the positive impact this had on our lives.

Kenneth and Alex install a new kitchen sink

Alex has helped me in countless, and priceless ways. How did I meet the woman I have loved for the past three years? Alex introduced us. The reason my girlfriend and I have a steady income together? Because of Alex. How I found an awesome roommate to live with? Alex. The reason my father, Doug, is happy and healthy? Alex. And when I was evicted from my home, guess who took me in? Alex.

I’ve worked in pet grooming with Alex for a few years and I have seen him become a respected business man. Pet grooming might not sound immediately important to anyone, but Alex has clients from all around the world. The week after a local news station covered Alex’s deportation case, he was flooded with hundreds of people expressing their support to him, and their anger that he was facing deportation. Most of all, they expressed their support for the love that Alex shares with my Dad. Alex has truly made his mark on not only me and my Dad, but my family, the neighborhood, and the entire community that has known him for many years.

I’m not the only one who has benefited Alex’s tremendous capacity to improve the lot of others. Our entire family simply hasn't been the same since Alex stepped into our lives. For years, during the holiday season, the talk of the family was all about Alex and his elaborately decorated house—almost identical to Santa’s Village. I couldn’t even begin to imagine how our family would go about facing a holiday if Alex is deported.

I could easily speak highly of Alex for hours and I invite anyone to ask me anything about my stepfather. I love Alex, and I will fight by his side until I know that he will remain safe in my country. I won’t stop fighting for Alex until the Defense of Marriage Act is gone forever, and full marriage equality reigns throughout the United States for all couples.

Doug & Alex Face DOMA Deportation Hearing on July 13! Help Us Save Their Marriage and Stop the Deportation

2011-06-26T11:35:00.012-07:00

In June, Alex and Doug celebrated six years together as a couple

On July 13 in San Francisco, Doug Gentry and Alex Benshimol, a married California couple who have been together for six years, will face every same-sex binational couple’s worst nightmare: a deportation hearing. As anyone following this issue knows, for years there has been little hope for same-sex binational couples seeking to reside together in the United States. Many binational couples are legally married like Alex and Doug, but they are still treated as legal strangers in the eyes of the federal government. There is only one reason Doug and Alex are facing deportation proceedings at all. That reason is DOMA, a law that the President of the United States himself has determined to be indefensible and unconstitutional.

Doug and Alex are one of the founding couples of the Stop The Deportations-DOMA Project campaign. Doug, a U.S. citizen, filed a marriage-based "green card" petition for Alex in July 2010. It was denied in March in a one page letter citing DOMA as the only reason. The couple re-filed the petition in June, citing changes in the administration position on DOMA that took place in February, and the Attorney General's intervention in a Board of Immigration Appeals case in April involving a gay binational couple facing deportation which was made public on May 5. [Please see note below regarding the filing of marriage-based green card petitions by married same-sex binational couples.]

On July 13 we will ask the Immigration Judge and the Immigration and Customs Enforcement attorney prosecuting the case to put these deportation proceedings on hold pending the outcome of efforts to repeal DOMA or a final definitive ruling on DOMA's constitutionality by the federal courts. No American citizen, straight or gay, should see the love of their life torn away from them by deportation. Our laws provide for a clear path to a green card for married opposite-sex binational couples, including those already in deportation proceedings. Doug and Alex should be treated equally and fairly. They should not be forced to live under this extraordinary stress one minute longer.

[Doug's 26-year-old son, Kenneth Gentry, has written to both Senators Feinstein and Boxer asking them to contact DHS and stop the deportation of his stepfather that is tearing apart his family.]

Doug and Alex have waged a public campaign to focus attention on the impact of DOMA on binational couples facing the imminent, irreversible harm of deportation. Doug and Alex are fighting to be together and save their marriage. They they are also fighting for their family: Doug's two children from a previous marriage consider Alex to be their stepfather and are heartbroken at the idea that he may be deported to his native country, Venezuela. Clearly, there is no option for Doug and his children to move to Venezuela, where life is not only dangerous for LGBT people but where Doug and his children would be unable to obtain any legal status, since Doug's marriage to Alex is not recognized in that country for immigration purposes. DOMA will tear apart this California family unless we stop this deportation.

As part of their campaign, Doug and Alex were featured recently in articles by the Associated Press and Frontiers magazine. Earlier this year, they were the subject of this campaign by Freedom to Marry, the pre-eminent national organization fighting for full marriage equality. Doug and Alex have also shared their story with their local CBS television affiliate, in this very touching report that aired on February 10. The southern California newspaper, the Press-Enterprise, profiled Doug and Alex in this story on February 8.

Alex came into the U.S. 12 years ago from Venezuela and overstayed a tourist visa, an immigration violation that straight binational couples can easily remedy once married; as a gay married couple, Doug and Alex do not have that option. We believe the political will of our elected leaders must be directed at this issue so that DOMA is repealed quickly. All American citizens deserve the right to pursue life and happiness with the liberty and equality guaranteed us all by our Constitution. We need our elected officials to show leadership and resolve on this issue. The Obama administration has the power to protect couples like Doug and Alex so they are not torn apart by deportation. Join us in declaring that the cruel discrimination that has been inflicted on couples like Doug and Alex MUST finally come to an end.

As readers of this site know, for decades, and certainly since DOMA became law, LGBT binational couples have fought discrimination in US immigration law. At best, our foreign partners and spouses have managed to stay in the US with temporary visas related to work or study. But even those lucky few are, like all others, deprived of access to a “green card” on the basis of their relationship with their life partner, no matter how long or how committed that relationship is. Binational couples cannot build a future together and live with tremendous insecurity, even though many are raising U.S.-born children together. Far more often couples are forced to live apart in different countries or they are exiled to one of the more than 20 countries in the world that respect our families. Perhaps the greatest number are those forced to live in the United States in the shadows with constant uncertainty; fear of deportation and ruin hanging over their heads. This destroys marriages, and tears apart our families. It is a humanitarian crisis that must come to an end.

Please join Out4Immigration, Stop the Deportations, GetEQUAL, Marriage Equality USA, and your fellow citizens in urging President Obama and Homeland Security Secretary Napolitano to take action to recognize Doug and Alex’s marriage and prevent another family from being torn apart!

Sign the petition here. Help us save this marriage and stop the deportation of Alex Benshimol. Fight back against DOMA and protect all lesbian and gay binational families.

Alex and Doug on their wedding day in July 2010

NOTE: Stop the Deportations - The DOMA Project warns that filing of marriage-based immigration petitions should not be undertaken without the guidance of an attorney with expertise in LGBT-specific immigration law and DOMA. In most cases, filing such petitions can put the foreign national spouse in danger of deportation or complicate eligibility for a non-immigrant visa. Please contact us here. if you have any questions about this issue.

Victory for Sveta & Andi in Chicago! Lesbian Couple Stops DOMA Deportation by Bravely Fighting For Their Marriage and Their Married Name, Alongside Asylum Claim

2011-06-21T11:06:00.004-07:00

Readers of this site will recall this earlier post, "Sveta & Andi: Together for 11 Years, Married Lesbian Couple in Illinois Faces June Deportation Hearing." Sveta had been legally in the U.S. for almost all of the last 15 years. The government of Kazakhstan stripped her of her citizenship in 2009 when consular officials found out she was a lesbian, married to her American wife, Andi. Sveta fought deportation to Kazakhstan because of her fear of persecution. She also pressed the court for consideration of the marriage-based green card petition filed by Andi. Sveta and Andi were emboldened to take this action after high-profile victories by other couples in the Stop The Deportations campaign. A combination of these strategies brought victory to this couple last week.

__________________

What's in a name? I've asked myself that question, comparing civil unions in our state, Illinois, to full equal marriage just across the river in Iowa. We know the answer. We are living it.

When my wife and I crossed that river to marry in Iowa, I took her last name. How could I not? It was an act of self-affirmation and it was one action of many to show to the world that we belonged together. That one shared name, meant that we were a family.

Sveta and Andi the day after the ruling

On the day we married, I thought back to the moment when I applied for asylum. I was asked by the Asylum Officer to strike my wife's name from my asylum application. That instruction was followed by a brief explanation that the Defense of Marriage Act would prevent her from being recognized as my spouse, even for the purpose of simply recording her existence as a fact on the application. While the asylum process exists to provide safe haven to the persecuted, at that moment it was distracted with the distracting business of erasing the existence of a U.S. citizen because of DOMA.

I thought of our first vows exchanged along with rings, many years before, an occasion which went unacknowledged by any state or federal law. That has improved though: for Iowa, for Illinois, and for us, as, surrounded by our friends and family, I wrote Andi's last name as my new name on the marriage license form. I claimed it in my new signature, and from that moment on we shared a name.

Thank you, Iowa.

On their wedding day

My Illinois state ID card was the only identification I had left as an asylum seeker, one that let me travel within US, if not outside it. As a stateless person, stripped of my citizenship by my own government, I was lucky to hold any identification to begin with. I frequently worried about what might happen if enough time had passed and the only identification that I held expired while my immigration case was still on hold. What happens if I ever lose it? I had no clear answer. The unlucky timing of my first hearings scheduled by the court landed me in a frozen state: just a few days short of eligibility to receive a temporary work authorization card. I was in limbo for an indeterminate time onward. This limitation came with the bonus of not being able to initiate a name change on a social security record, and, consequently, my only ID card. An irreplaceable, precious card, alas, with my maiden name on it.

What's in a name? It was just a word printed on a piece of plastic, an identity card but not an identity that should matter. Considering other vital priorities - survival, safety, staying together - this particular uncorrected matter could be delayed. Despite the last name my only ID held, we were married. I introduced myself and signed paperwork using our shared last name. We informed the immigration court of our marriage and submitted a copy of marriage certificate to be examined at the next hearing.

Coincidentally, this hearing fell on the date of our first anniversary: June 15th was when Andi and I exchanged our rings and vows. Now, six years later, half of that day was to be taken by the immigration proceedings and the other half... I could not plan that far. It was not up to me.

As the proceedings began, I was required to state my name. And so, I leaned toward the microphone, and said it.

My judge looked at me and explained that for the purposes of the court, the proceedings would have to use my maiden name. Oh, I thought. Well, I tried. And then the judge continued, taking the time to add that it had to be done because my asylum application was originally filed using that name. I realized what he was saying. That was the only reason the judge had to use my maiden name.

It was a minor remark, but it came as a welcome surprise and thus was memorable.

The judge surprised the couple with his handwritten notation "Svetlana Apodaca" at the top of his decision, accepting that Sveta and Andi were married and permitting Sveta the dignity of sharing the name of her spouse

During the hearing, I listened to others discuss the undecided issue of DOMA within the immigration context, they spoke of many unknowns, of undetermined dates and lack of scheduled solutions. I did not expect this to be easy; I was prepared for a long day in court and no clear or good ways out. Determined to pursue every possibility available to us, my lawyer spoke of the plans to appeal in the future, of many reasons to wait, to postpone the deportation proceedings, to leave my case unresolved until either the legislature or the higher courts decide on the issue of DOMA, and marriages, for good. In sort, we pursued every avenue to impress upon the court and the government attorney that we would fight for our marriage to be treated equally. We learned from the success of other married binational couples who had gone before us, and whose stories you have read here. We were fortunate to be able to consult with Lavi Soloway about those cases. In the end, the judge, having given consideration to the issues and challenges surrounding the marriage-based green card petition, pressed on with my asylum claim. He chose to continue listening to the remaining witnesses and to render a final decision that would determine the fate of our marriage and our future together.

When, hours later, a decision was made, my asylum was granted.

Granted.

At that long, stunned second, I remember staring at the courtroom through a sudden glassy wall. I put all of my hopes toward what I perceived to be the best case scenario: several years of unresolved, undefined limbo status contested and fought over in courts, but... Is this over? Now?

I don't cry often. I did, as I continued listening to the verdict.

It sunk in, gradual and striking: I am safe. I am allowed to stay. I would not be separated from my wife.

As the judge signed the final order, he took the extra step of adding my married name onto the document.

I was stunned and numb as I took that paper with my name - my actual name - on it. Outside the courtroom, my wife stared in question and listened and rushed to hold me. Days later I was still trying to comprehend my new reality. The fact might hit me someday soon with its sheer impact and I'd be stunned and amazed all over again.

With one judgement, with one document, and within one day, I, once again, had permission to work, a possibility of travelling the world freely, and a chance of someday being able to cast a vote. Against the odds, Andi and I, once more, could live together without the fear of separation and had a future we could plan for. And I had my name back.

Getting a new ID, with my married name on it, was no longer an impossibility.

It was a long road, one that many couples like us have faced before us and will face again. Immigration Court is a fate which both of us would have been spared from, had we been a heterosexual couple, acknowledged and protected by many aspects of US immigration law. But we are not there - not yet. We are a married binational same-sex couple and our green card application submitted for me by my US citizen wife before our hearing date, in defiance of DOMA, is pending without resolution. We are so proud to be standing with other married binational couples: those who stood up to DOMA first by filing marriage-based petitions and impressed with their simple humanity our resolve to be treated equally. We derived courage and support from the leadership of others who, in the last year, forcefully paved the way by filing marriage-based petitions and fighting to halt deportations.

To all the other couples like us who are fighting to remain together in this country, I wish them only the best and I admire their actions. We must keep up the pressure on the system. Even tiny incremental victories like reclaiming our married name from a system that would exclude us become victories for every couple that comes after.

Our first anniversary date now holds a double meaning. Andi and I keep track of many such personal anniversaries. I would guess that other couples in our situation also end up with multiple anniversaries instead of a single wedding date: there are days of trading and re-trading vows, rings, “I Do's", until such act is acknowledged, counted, recognized one piece at a time. Recognition, and piecemeal rights to commitment, to existence, are won and will continue to be won, in the course of many days, months, and years, by activism and by stories like ours, in court or in legislature.

One day, looking back free of the burden of DOMA, we'll have many more occasions to celebrate. But until then, we must keep telling our stories.

Submitted by Sveta Apodaca

ICE Memo on Deportations Provides Guidance on Use of Prosecutorial Discretion Which Will Help Binational Couples

2011-06-20T16:16:00.001-07:00

Read the complete text of the Immigration and Customs Enforcement Memo here and this related story, "US Pledges to Raise Deportation Threshhold," New York Times, June 18, 2011 by Julia Preston.

Making History: Married, Gay Binational Couple Goes to Their Green Card Interview in San Francisco

2011-06-15T12:36:00.001-07:00

Jon Carr and Sergio Suhett after their green card interview Tuesday at
the U.S. Citizenship & Immigration Services building in downtown San Francisco

Jon Anthony Carr and Sergio Suhett met in 1995 when Jon spotted Sergio across a crowded reservations center at United Airlines and offered him assistance; they’ve been learning from one another ever since. They were first married in 2004 when then-Mayor Gavin Newsom directed his clerks to perform marriages for lesbian and gay couples. After those marriages were voided, the couple re-married in 2008 during the brief window of legal marriage in California that lasted until Proposition 8 was passed amending that state’s constitution to once again bar lesbian and gay couples from marriage.

Sergio, who was born in Brazil, is in the United States in a non-permanent lawful status that does not provide a path to a green card or citizenship. This status allows him to live and work in the US legally indefinitely but if he ever leaves the country -- even for a week-long vacation -- he can never return. As the years went by and they began to look ahead to their future, they realized they needed greater security for Sergio. And they wanted to be able to see the world together. For that they would have to get Sergio a green card on the basis of their marriage which is impossible, of course, because the federal government is still barred by DOMA from recognizing their legal marriage. The basic unfairness of this and their awareness of the plight of many LGBT binational couples led them to join the fight for same-sex immigration rights. In fact, they were the first couple to participate in The DOMA Project’s Stop the Deportations campaign.

After consulting with their attorney, Lavi Soloway, Jon filed an I-130 Petition for Alien Relative for Sergio in July 2010. All they wanted was for Sergio to be given the same recognition as any other foreign-born spouse of an American citizen. Even though they knew that DOMA made this impossible for the present, with Suhett temporarily allowed to stay in the US, they decided to become part of an effort to challenge DOMA.

A few weeks ago, to their surprise and delight, they received a notice that they had been scheduled for an interview. “We were excited when Lavi called to tell us that we would be going to a green card interview just like any other married couple. The prospect of having an Immigration Officer sitting down with us, asking questions about our relationship and our marriage… it feels like a door is beginning to open.”

In the weeks leading up to the interview, Jon and Sergio put together a large photo album illustrating their 15 years together as a couple. They collected proof that they owned their car together, that both their names were on their apartment’s lease, and that they used money from their joint bank accounts to buy everyday domestic necessities. Lastly, they asked friends and family to write letters attesting to the truth of their relationship as a loving couple. They crossed every T and dotted every I. They didn’t want to give the government any reason to deny them on a technicality or for lack of evidence of their relationship. They wanted to demonstrate to the government that their case was approvable on the evidence. If there was to be a denial, Jon and Sergio wanted it to be clear that DOMA was solely to blame.

Finally, the day of the interview arrived: Tuesday June 14. Joined by their attorney, the couple made their way with some anticipation to the Citizenship and Immigration Service building in downtown San Francisco. Though they were confident that Sergio was safe, they couldn’t help but be a little anxious as they entered uncharted territory. To our knowledge, Jon and Sergio were attending the first ever green card marriage interview for a same-sex couple since the Obama administration announced it would no longer defend DOMA because it believed that law was unconstitutional.

Yesterday, the day of the interview, an op-ed that the couple wrote telling their story appeared in the San Francisco Chronicle (‘No Green Card for My Spouse’). They hesitated before writing the piece for, suddenly, thousands of strangers would know all about them. But they understood that even in San Francisco there were people who had no idea of how few protections gay and lesbian Americans have for their legal spouses.

Jon and Sergio attended their interview at a time when public opinion has moved decisively and consistently against DOMA and toward marriage equality. Not only has the Obama administration’s changed stance indicated that DOMA is indefensible, but Congress has taken up its repeal in both the House and Senate, and federal courts (including a stunning Bankruptcy Court decision in California this week) have rejected DOMA as unconstitutional. This is the context in which Jon and Sergio sat down for their interview and perhaps for that reason it should not be surprising that they received a warm and cordial reception.

The Immigration Officer who conducted the interview noted at the outset that some of her colleagues had seen their op-ed and that the office was eagerly anticipating their arrival. She went on to ask them several of the questions they had expected: Where and when had they met? Had they ever purchased property together? When had they married? She was surprised and, it seemed, dismayed to hear that they’d actually had to marry a second time after their first marriage was invalidated along with thousands of others by the state. She asked where they’d gone on vacations and the guys happily supplied the details of a fifth anniversary at Walt Disney World, a tenth in Hawaii, and so on. Without thinking, Sergio grasped Jon’s hand and then found himself feeling self-conscious about it, wondering, after years of having strangers question the validity of his marriage, if the Officer might react negatively; her accepting smile suggested that she recognized real affection when she saw it. As expected, she indicated to Jon and Sergio that current law prevented her from approving their petition. But, she added personally, she wished she could approve it and was sorry she could not. Again the officer’s expression reflected that she knew how much it meant to both Jon and Sergio to have someone in her position recognize their humanity and their love for each other.

As they parted, Jon and Sergio thanked the officer and noted that they would keep up the fight against DOMA so that the petition could be approved one day soon. In the meantime, they will await a final decision on their petition which will come at a future date by mail after further review.

San Francisco Chronicle: Jon and Sergio's Story

2011-06-15T12:22:00.001-07:00

Sergio and Jon were the first binational couple to join Stop The Deportations. Jon filed a green card petition for Sergio in July 2010 and almost 11 months later they were interviewed USCIS in San Francisco

No Green Card For My Spouse
Op-Ed published by the San Francisco Chronicle on June 14, 2011

Today my husband, Sergio, and I will report to the U.S. Bureau of Citizenship and Immigration Services to be interviewed for the purpose of determining the legitimacy of our marriage in connection with my petition for his "green card" as my spouse. Unfortunately, despite the historic nature of this interview - the first, to our knowledge, to be conducted for a same-sex couple - it will only be a formality, for we stand no chance of having our case approved.

Once the immigration officer determines that our marital relationship is genuine, our case will be tossed out with a perfunctory denial because our marriage cannot be recognized by the federal government.

The interview occurs 15 years and seven months after we met, moved in together and made a permanent commitment to each other, seven years and four months after our first marriage ceremony was conducted at San Francisco's City Hall, six years and 10 months after that marriage was invalidated by the California Supreme Court, four years and seven months after we decided to settle temporarily for registering as domestic partners, and two years and nine months after being allowed by the state of California to marry yet again.

Unlike many others preceding us, we experience no trepidation about this interview, for Sergio and I are not merely married, we're super-married. If we keep going at this rate, we will catch up with Zsa Zsa Gabor, only without all the added fuss of having to repeatedly change partners.

Just one thing impedes my right as an American to sponsor my Brazilian spouse for citizenship, the so-called Defense of Marriage Act, which essentially forces the federal government to discriminate against all legally married lesbian and gay couples in this country. When DOMA was signed into law in 1996, Sergio and I had settled into our first apartment, opened our first joint bank account and were going about the business of establishing a life together. Though Sergio's legal status was up in the air, we didn't dwell upon it. Who wants to think about depressing things when there are matters of shared closet space and adopting pets to consider? It would never have occurred to us then that we would one day be legally married and that we would be fighting the federal government for recognition of our marriage so that we could finally resolve Sergio's immigration status.

A lot has changed over the years. Some people have always objected to the legal recognition of my marriage and, while some still do, I won't debate it with them because my mind's pretty well closed on the subject.

I'm from Rhode Island, see, and I stand with the 17th century theologian and founder of the Rhode Island colony, Roger Williams, on this one:

"Enforced uniformity confounds civil and religious liberty and denies the principles of Christianity and civility."

Nowadays, more people are seeing things Williams' way than aren't. Which leads me to wonder: If the purpose of enshrining discrimination in federal law was to defend society's definition of marriage at a time when only 25 percent of Americans favored marriage equality for same-sex couples, then why, when polls now consistently indicate that the majority of Americans support it, is DOMA still the law of the land?

[See this Op-Ed as published here on the Chronicle's website.]

Jon Anthony Carr is a writer, film historian and part-time student at City College of San Francisco. He encourages readers to contact their congressional representatives and ask them to support the Respect for Marriage Act. To learn more, go to stopthedeportations.com or email stopthedeportations [at] gmail.com.

After Marrying, Brian & Anton File Spousal Green Card Petition and Continue Their Fight Against Deportation

2011-06-15T09:09:00.002-07:00

Getting Married in DC
by Brian Andersen

In February, we were saved from a Valentine's Day deportation by the tremendous, non-stop, round the clock efforts of Lavi Soloway and the Stop the Deportations campaign.

At the time Anton and I were not married, but we had been dating for seven months and we felt that we had a very strong connection. We were in love and we knew that we wanted to spend our lives together.

Some people may have wondered why we fought so hard for something that was relatively new? For us there was never a question that we had to fight for our love.

We were interviewed at the time by many journalists, and CNN and many other news outlets reported our fight to stop Anton's deportation. While we won a temporary victory but we still live in constant fear that Anton could be deported. In the meantime, our relationship has progressed. We moved in together and started to make plans to marry on June 12 in Washington, DC and then to celebrate with family in friends in August.

The decision to marry was not one that we took lightly. Despite knowing each other for just ten months, we knew that this was a commitment we wanted to make to each other. In the past ten months we have been inseparable, spending at least five days a week together and often more.

From the time we met, we knew there was something special between us. Naturally conversation led to what we wanted and expected out of our futures, both individually and together. Of course the topic of marriage came up, and was always something we repeatedly returned to as something we wanted for ourselves down the road. Neither of us wanted to take that leap without careful consideration, and with time we just knew it was the right move for us. We were living together, spending all of our time together, sharing expenses, laughs, meals, and nights at home watching movies.

Philadelphia Weekly reports on Brian and Anton's wedding plans

We chose to have a small ceremony in Washington, DC for a few reasons. First, unlike Pennsylvania where we lived, Washington was one of the six jurisdictions in the United States where we could have a legally recognized marriage. As a binational gay couple, our relationship faces blatant discrimination by federal law, specifically the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), which precludes the federal government from recognizing our marriage. We specifically chose Lafayette Park across from the White House for our ceremony because we wanted to make a statement to the Obama administration with the most personal moments---our marriage---while standing in a pleasant and aesthetically appealing environment. Our feeling is that the Obama administration is our ally, and so we celebrate that a champion of LGBT rights occupies the White House. At the same time, while Obama administration has come out and publicly stated it believes DOMA is unconstitutional, we need him to do more to ensure that we are not torn apart. Our message: "President Obama, Defend Our Marriage."

To our surprise, two other binational couples –complete strangers to us who heard about our plans to marry– showed up unexpectedly to show their support for our marriage and celebrate the day with us. It warmed our hearts to know we weren’t alone, and to meet others who were facing these challenges.

Last night I filed a marriage-based green card petition to sponsor Anton to remain in the United States. I filed this petition to keep my husband and life partner here and to keep my family together. That should be the automatic result, but because of DOMA we embark on the next chapter in a fight that none of us should have to fight. Anton and I will continue to fight for ourselves and for the thousands of binational couples out there.

We hope that those who come after us can follow the path of any other American citizen who can sponsor his or her spouse for a green card. We can only hope that day comes sooner rather than later.

For more background on this case see Breaking News From Philadelphia Weekly.

Across from the White House, Brian & Anton Get Married

2011-06-13T13:20:00.000-07:00


The happily married couple in Lafayette Park Sunday afternoon

Obama Will Not " Win The Future" In Time For Spouses of Lesbian & Gay Americans Facing DOMA Deportations

2011-06-11T16:52:00.000-07:00

This comprehensive report on the crisis of DOMA deportations demands that the Obama administration act immediately (it was cross posted at Pam's House Blend). It is a must-read for anyone following the progress of our Stop The Deportations campaign.

We started this work in 1993, just three years after U.S. immigration law was amended to remove the bar on admissibility of gay and lesbian non-citizens. In the intervening 18 years we have helped to build a diverse movement of binational couples, organizations and advocates. We have raised the profile of this issue for the general public, elected officials and major LGBT and immigration reform organizations.

Last July, we launched a new strategy called The DOMA Project. Beginning with the Stop The Deportations campaign our effort was designed to highlight what we believe is the core issue for binational couples: marriage (in)equality. We did this by challenging DOMA in Immigration Court. The message could not be simpler: married same-sex binational couples should be protected by the family unification provisions of our existing immigration laws just like all other married binational couples. The only obstacle that remains is DOMA. For that reason we have argued that until DOMA's fate is determined by Congress or the courts this administration must stop deportations that separate lesbian and gay couples, destroying marriages and families. Fighting to halt deportations is a vital part of winning full equality for all binational couples.

Participant couples include those who are separated, those who are exiled, those facing imminent deportation and those who are together in this country but who are living in fear of an uncertain future.

As the architects of this new DOMA-focused campaign we have catapulted the issue of binational couples into the media and brought the crisis of "DOMA deportations" to the White House itself. You can help us continue this momentum.

To achieve full equality we need your participation and support. Our own personal stories remain our most valuable tool. We have developed a unique blend of legal strategy and advocacy for every couple involved in the Stop The Deportations campaign---strategies that protect them and advance the broader goal of defeating DOMA. Contact us here to find out how you can get involved. It can be as simple as sharing your story and does not require revealing any identifying information. We are also accepting donations to help us expand this effort, in partnership with the Love, Honor, Cherish Foundation.

As part of this pro bono project we have provided free legal advice to binational couples who are separated, exiled or facing deportation. We have collaborated with other attorneys, activists and organizations providing strategic support as binational couples face deportations hearings in Immigration Courts around the country.

And most importantly, we are winning.

We have stopped four deportations in four months. In each case, the government has agreed to allow the couple to remain together for now. In doing so, the government demonstrates that it can respect their relationship, even while DOMA still prevents recognition of their marriage.

(Read about these victories: Anton & Brian, Rodrigo & Edwin, Monica & Cristina, and Henry & Josh.)

The weeks and months ahead will be extremely busy here at Stop The Deportations. We are confident that we will get our message through and that we will win interim protection for all couples until the day that DOMA is finally repealed or struck down by the Supreme Court. This fight is a part of a larger battle to win full equality.

Breaking News from Philadelphia Weekly: Brian & Anton to Marry This Weekend, DOMA Deportation Still Looms

2011-06-09T00:01:00.002-07:00

Anton Tanumihardja fought a Valentine's Day deportation and won a temporary reprieve,
but their legal battle against DOMA has just begun. (Photo by Jeff Fusco)

Readers of this site will remember the victory achieved by The DOMA Project's Stop The Deportations campaign in the case of Anton Tanumihadja earlier this year. (See "Deportation Delayed For Philly Couple," Philadelphia Gay News and media coverage of Anton and Brian's fight against deportation on CNN and NPR, MetroWeeky, and Queerty).

Anton was scheduled for deportation on Valentine's Day when he reached out to us at the beginning of February for help. His partner, Brian Andersen, and the staff at the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) worked hard diligently with Stop The Deportations to bring their plight to national attention. After successfully winning a reprieve from deportation, Brian and Anton have continued to plan their future together. In an extensive interview with the Philadelphia Weekly, they disclosed for the first time that they will marry this weekend in Washington, D.C. We congratulate Brian and Anton on their marriage and assure them that we will continue to fight to keep them together in this country.

Here's the full article from today's Philadelphia Weekly.

White House Refuses to Consider Halt to Deportations, Comprehensive Immigration Reform Must Come First

2011-06-08T23:32:00.003-07:00

Our full response to the White House statement appears below.
Watch clip of White House press briefing addressing DOMA deportations here.

See complete Metro Weekly article by Chris Geidner here.

Response by Stop The Deportations to today's statement by White House Press Secretary Jay Carney:

TOWLEROAD: White House Pushes Immigration Reform When Asked About Halting DOMA Deportations

2011-06-08T22:00:00.000-07:00

See original post here.

Andrew Sullivan: DOMA Tearing a Marriage Apart

2011-06-08T21:09:00.000-07:00

AmericaBlog: DOMA Rips Apart Married Binational Couples

2011-06-08T21:05:00.000-07:00

QUEERTY: Cristina & Monica Face DOMA Deportation Hearing in December, They Need Repeal Now!

2011-06-08T21:02:00.000-07:00

Cristina & Monica Featured in Video Highlighting DOMA's Harm on Married Binational Couple Fighting Deportation

2011-06-08T07:26:00.000-07:00

Today Freedom to Marry released a video produced in partnership with In The Life Media telling the moving story of Cristina Alcota and Monica Ojeda, who, though legally married, face deportation or separation because the so-called Defense of Marriage Act denies married same-sex couples immigration protections. (Scroll down to view the video in Spanish, or to view in Spanish with English subtitles, click here.)

“Cristina and Monica fell in love, made a lifetime commitment to one another, and got married. Now they spend every day worrying about whether they will be ripped apart or forced into exile in order to stay together because the so-called Defense of Marriage Act keeps the U.S. government from honoring their marriage,” said Evan Wolfson, Founder and President of Freedom to Marry. “If not for DOMA, Cristina would be able to petition for Monica as her spouse without any difficulty. It is time to overturn DOMA and ensure that all Americans are treated fairly and equally under the law.”

Married lesbian and gay binational couples have moved to the forefront of the fight against DOMA since the launch of The DOMA Project's Stop The Deportations Campaign last summer.

"We recognized that support for Marriage Equality in the United States had shifted dramatically in our favor, said Lavi Soloway, attorney for Cristina and Monica and co-founder of the Stop The Deportations campaign. "Increasingly, binational couples were marrying in the five states and the District of Colombia where marriage equality had been achieved. We decided to take on DOMA with a group of married binational couples leading the charge, something that had not been done before. We focused specifically on married couples facing deportation to illustrate DOMA's cruelest impact: tearing apart our families and destroying marriages. As a result of our work, the plight of binational couples is now more accurately understood as harm caused by DOMA. It is a simple matter of equality. Without DOMA, gay and lesbian Americans would be able to petition for their spouses under the existing provisions of U.S. immigration law. It is, therefore, imperative that DOMA be repealed and that a moratorium on deportations of spouses of lesbian and gay American be implemented by the administration immediately so that all families are protected."

Cristina and Monica were among the founding couples of the Stop The Deportations campaign. For the past eight months they have shared their story and bravely fought against DOMA in immigration court and the media, winning a reprieve from deportation earlier this year on the basis of their marriage. Christina and Monica have been in the forefront of the campaign urging the Obama Administration to halt deportations of law-abiding spouses of lesbian and gay American citizens pending the outcome of legal challenges to DOMA.

Cristina and Monica met several years ago when Cristina was in school for social work. They married in a ceremony in Connecticut. An American citizen, Cristina petitioned for her wife Monica, an Argentinean national, to obtain a "green card." Because they are a same-sex couple, the so-called Defense of Marriage Act bars the federal government from honoring their marriage for the purposes of immigration, and Cristina's petition for Monica cannot be approved. Still they continue their fight to build a future together in this country. In March, an immigration judge delayed their case in light of court challenges finding DOMA unconstitutional, and the Department of Justice’s determination that DOMA is indefensible under the Constitution. They return to immigration court on December 6 to once again fight for the right to be together.

Of marriage, Cristina Alcota says in the video “You’re doing this to be with the person you love for the rest of your life… marriage is a bond that cannot be broken that easily.” She goes on to say “The government doesn’t recognize that our marriage is valid for purposes of immigration because of DOMA and we are facing being either torn apart or being removed from this country.”

Cristina is a social worker and Monica is an antique furniture restorer. The two women currently live in Queens, New York.

Cristina and Monica have appeared numerous times in the media as activists for the DOMA Project's Stop The Deportations campaign, including: CNN, New York Daily News (twice), Gay City News (twice) and NY1 Pura Politica.

The DOMA Project Welcomes Legal Intern, Jesus Torres

2011-06-07T04:00:00.007-07:00

Jesus Torres

Jesus Torres joins The DOMA Project this month as a legal intern where he will be involved in legal research and advocacy for our growing docket of cases involving lesbian and gay binational couples who are facing deportation, separation or exile because of DOMA. Jesus immigrated from Mexico with his family to the United States as a child. He graduated from the University of Dallas in 2005 with a degree in Psychology. He is currently attending the William H. Bowen School of Law at the University of Arkansas at Little Rock where he is vice-president of Bowen Lambda, the LGBT law students organization and a member of the Hispanic Law Student Association.

Last summer, Jesus worked at the National Hispanic Bar Foundation in Washington DC where he was a mentor in the Future Latino Leaders Law Camp. Before going to law school, Jesus worked in the Dallas office of the the large national law firm, Akin Gump Straus Hauer & Feld, and as an immigration paralegal at the Dallas law firm of Reina & Associates working primarily on family-based immigration cases. We are please to welcome Jesus to The DOMA Project.

Binational Couples Forced to Choose: Love or Country?

2011-06-06T23:41:00.001-07:00

Los Angeles Times: Same-Sex Couples In Exile Find Rough Road to Immigration, Featuring DOMA Project Participants

2011-06-06T07:26:00.002-07:00

Los Angeles Times reporter Paloma Esquivel worked for months interviewing binational couples in exile who are participants in our project to fight back against DOMA. She has featured the stories of Jesse and Max in London and Linas and Jan in Stockholm. The full article is here. Read latest update on Jesse and Max here.

Associated Press Highlights Doug and Alex: The Fight To Save Their Marriage and Stop Deportation

2011-06-05T12:39:00.000-07:00

Alex and Doug recently participated in the NOH8 photo project
They must appear for a deportation hearing in Immigration Court on July 13

Married Binational Lesbian Couple, Together for Ten Years and Raising Three Children, Live in Fear of Deportation

2011-06-03T05:31:00.000-07:00

Pictured here with their oldest child when he was five years old, the couple also has two daughters

My wife is from England and we have been in a committed life partner relationship for 10 years. When California allowed lesbian and gay couples to marry we knew immediately that we wanted to get married. We knew we wanted that legal document to secure our future together not only for us, but for our family. My wife and I have been living in California for the past 10 years raising my son. Recently, we adopted two girls to expand our family.

It doesn’t make any sense to me that my wife can become a parent to American children through adoption and be legally married to me, an American citizen, but still has no "legal" status. She does not even have the right to get a driver’s license or a lawful employment. All we want is to have the right to be able to make our life together in this country and raise our children. But for the past decade we have lived with great uncertainty. My wife's immigration status lapsed, and she stayed. What choice did we have? We could not leave because of our son. And so, we have created a family life for ourselves under tremendous disadvantages and hardships imposed on us by my government. My wife has had no life and no legal identity in this country for the past 10 years because the “government” declares through the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) that our marriage is not real. It feels very real to me. I have been supporting our family this whole time and we have had a lot of ups and downs financially. This situation has almost torn us apart too, but we love each other so much and we just want to live a happy life. That determination keeps us moving forward day by day with a small hope in our hearts.

I keep saying to my wife that it will happen, that one day my own government will stop this insanity. One day the American government will recognize her as my wife and that we will have all the same rights as other married couples. I reassure her, but it's hard to keep the faith. I know in my heart that one day I will have the same right as all other Americans, to sponsor my spouse and to keep my family intact. My wife, however, has doubts. Because it’s been so long, she gets stressed out when we leave the house. Her fear is palpable. She feels like she has to constantly look over her shoulder and is terrified when she sees a police officer drive by us. She panics that a police officer might pull us over for some routine traffic issue and that may lead to her being discovered and turned over to ICE. She imagines that day coming when she will be taken away. This constant fear she feels is overwhelming and just not fair. She is a human being and should be treated like one. She is a good wife and mother, why can nobody see what these discriminatory laws are doing to LGBT families like us? We live through so much anxiety, our future is uncertain, we have extreme financial hardship and we are trying to make all of this work and bring up our children to be productive and happy members of society. But our government undermines us by making us all second-class citizens.

Left with no other choice, I almost decided to leave the United States. Even though I truly love my country I felt on occasion that I had to move to England because at least there my wife would have been able to sponsor me for the equivalent of a "green card." I would have been eligible to work and we would have felt at peace. But, because of my son I had to stay here. I get so angry when I start thinking about our situation and I just want to scream at all those politicians who think they know what the American public wants. We really need something to change, and fast. At this point, it’s not about getting a job and helping out financially. It’s about peace of mind and passing on to our children a life in which their parents are treated with dignity and respect by their own government. For us it is about knowing you truly belong. We are a family, no matter what anyone else says. We have love, understanding and patience on our side. Children, however, grow up quickly. They need to know that both their parents will be here for the long term. Can any elected official in Washington look at me in the eye and tell me why it makes sense that this government is not establishing a policy to halt deportations of all spouses of lesbian and gay Americans right now? Can any elected official tell me why our children do not deserve to have the same protections as is provided to all other families under U.S. immigration law?

On behalf of our three beautiful children we ask anyone reading this to join our cause. Help us convince both our U.S. Senators, Dianne Feinstein and Barbara Boxer, to fight for binational couples and our children. Yes, DOMA must be repealed or immigration laws must be reformed to include LGBT families. But we must also have protection now.

President Obama: Americans Should Not Be Forced To Choose Between Their Partners and Their Country

2011-06-02T10:30:00.002-07:00

This week there was a hopeful sign from the White House. For the first time since we launched the Stop The Deportations, Separations and Exile campaign, the President has signaled his support for lesbian and gay binational couples. In a document called "The Obama Administration's Commitment to Winning the Future for the LGBT Community," a follow up fact sheet to the President's May 31 LGBT Pride Month Proclamation, one of the progress points mentioned specifically addresses the plight of same-sex binational couples.

"President Obama believes ... that Americans with partners from other countries should not be faced with a painful choice between staying with their partner or staying in their country."

We must remind the President, however, that he has the power to realize this goal and issue an immediate moratorium on the deportations of spouses and partners of lesbian and gay Americans. This would provide protection for tens of thousands of binational LGBT families while Congress works to repeal DOMA. (Photo from MetroWeekly)

Married Houston Couple, David and Marco, Fight Deportation Despite Six Years Together As A Couple

2011-06-02T00:00:00.001-07:00

The love of my life, David, is from the beautiful country of Costa Rica; it is a place, where---despite its beauty and popularity for American tourists----lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people have been victimized in many cruel and horrible ways over the years. Some horrible experiences there caused him to leave and come to this country seeking safety and peace.

I met David almost six years ago. When we saw each other for the first time, we could not stop smiling. On August 21, 2005, we decided to be in a committed relationship. Ever since, every 21st of each month, we have dinner, get flowers and get each other anniversary cards. (Yeah, we have a pretty good collection of cards). We strongly believe that doing so will help us to keep our love alive and strong. At the beginning of 2008, I placed our wedding rings at the bottom of the wine bottle cases celebrating one more month and I proposed. You should have seen David’s face. Our rings read “M & D 08-21-2005”. Then, on April 25th 2008, we filed for domestic partnership and on October 2008, got married in California. Oh, those were awesome moments! We had our family and closest friends from Los Angeles, San Diego and Las Vegas with us celebrating this memorable occasion with us. It was a very simple ceremony, yet full of loving details such as a small path of roses, balloons in the pool, the cake with two men facing each other, a candle with the words “And two shall become one.” For our honeymoon, we went with our friends to Catalina Island in California and then later on, we went to the Niagara Falls in New York.

Our dreams are the same as those of any other married couple: to be happy, to travel, have a good job, buy a house, start a family and grow old together. When we see kids playing around, our hearts are moved. So we decided we wanted kids. We contacted an adoption agency and we started the application process to become adopting parents. We moved to Houston, TX where we were able to afford a house. One dream came true. A house just for the two of us. Now we could start our family.

As a couple, we have gone through many personal and family situations that helped us to grow and have brought us together. Beautiful moments such as spending our birthdays, Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays along with our families; or heartbreaking moments such as seeing my father passing away; seeing David losing a job due to his immigration status; or the day when David got detained by immigration officers. During those moments, we were able to examine our own personalities with all the defects and virtues we both have. Yes, we have had our share of ups and downs. We have had to ask for forgiveness and forgiven each other many times. But our love can do miracles and we keep holding hands to make it through all circumstances we may encounter.

We depend on each other emotionally and economically. We need to pay the mortgage, home owners insurance, flood insurance, house maintenance, auto insurance, bills, medical bills, food, entertainment, etc. While one is mowing the lawn, the other is cleaning the house. Not to mention taking care of Cooper, Ruper and Kitty… Like I said, we are just a regular couple.

My husband’s immigration status has taken its toll on us. He has been in deportation proceedings since August 2006. It has been tiring and it has taken a lot of energy and money. We have felt hopeless and we cannot plan our future. We have had to make heartbreaking decisions such discontinuing the adoption process; quitting the idea of starting a business, all just because we do not know what the future is going to be. How are we going to start a business if next year we may have to pack our stuff and be forced to leave the United States? How are we going to sell the house without losing the money it has been invested in it?... if it sells! It has been so stressful, that we had to look for therapy to cope with the uncertainty and anxiety we live with.

But the most frustrating part of all is that it is our government that is causing us all this pain by enforcing DOMA, rather than repealing it. I should not be treated as a second citizen; we should not go through this pain. We have seen heterosexual friends become permanent residents and citizens since the government does recognize their marriage. But, that is not the case for us. And yet we have paid all taxes to the government.

We sincerely hope that with the momentum gained since the President and the Attorney General announced their changed position on DOMA that we may find new ways to keep fighting for our right to be recognized as what we are…a regular married couple. David’s immigration judge will not only be David’s judge, but mine as well. USCIS will not only give or deny status to David, but to me as well. We need the fighting chance to stay together. We need to ultimately, stay together.

I beg everyone who is reading this to help us stop the deportations. No American citizen should be forced to watch his spouse deported because of a discriminatory law that the President and Attorney General have said is unconstitutional. It will take an enormous effort by many people to convince Janet Napolitano and President Obama to stop the deportations of the spouses of gay and lesbian Americans. But we have tremendous hope and we are committed to winning protection, not only for us, but for all gay and lesbian binational couples living in fear of separation or exile.

Norbert & Phil in West Africa: Why Marriage Matters

2011-05-30T07:00:00.000-07:00

I never in my wildest dreams would have imagined this for myself. The cultures are just too different, the language barrier is just too high, the potential just isn’t there, I would have said. But if my time in the Peace Corps has proven anything to me, it’s that life is full of surprises.

I would like to make a formal introduction. Readers, I present to you: my boyfriend, Norbert. He was born and raised in Abidjan, Côte d'Ivoire. When he was 18 years old, he won a scholarship to study fashion design in Paris. He has since worked successfully in the fashion industry throughout West Africa and in France. His most recent project: creating and organizing Ouagadougou’s first ever fashion week.

Norbert is fun, thoughtful, charming, and vivacious. He understands Western culture to at least the same degree that I understand African culture, probably even better. We are comfortable navigating either culture, but both of us still have much to learn. We communicate exclusively in French; Norbert doesn’t speak a word of English.

We met through friends of friends while I was working in Ouagadougou in August. At the time, I knew I was bound for Conakry, so the sparks that flew were somewhat dampened. We saw each other a few times before I left for Guinea, but we didn’t think we’d see each other again.

Then I finally arrived in Guinea, only to get stuck in the strife there. I had the option to take a temporary leave of absence from my Peace Corps service. But where would I go? I took a chance, went out on a limb. I asked Norbert if he could host me for a while, if I came back to Burkina Faso. He considered it, then said yes. So I flew back to Ouagadougou.

We spent day after day together, week after week. We ate together. We travelled together. We lived together. We learned about each other’s lives, and we fell in love with each other.

Agreeing that what we had was too valuable to throw away, we started to discuss our future. Although I didn’t know what the immediate future held for me and my Peace Corps service, I knew that when my service was finished, I wanted to live in New York City and study at Columbia University. The idea of living in America had never before crossed Norbert’s mind, but it was now enticing. If he could move to America and learn English, that would open up a whole new world for his fashion work. After some reflection, he agreed that he wanted to come to New York with me. It made sense for both of us. After my studies there, we could move anywhere in the world.

And then, for the first time ever, I started researching immigration. For a citizen of Côte d'Ivoire (or of any African country), getting just a temporary visa to come to the United States is very difficult. Citizens of developing countries have to overcome the presumption of immigration intent by demonstrating significant ties to their current residence, and this is completely up to the discretion of officers at US embassies. The other option is to try for an immigrant visa or "green card," but that is virtually impossible without a close relative who is a U.S. citizen. Marrying an American is one of the very few reliable paths to permanent residency.

Earlier in my Peace Corps service, I had attended the marriage of a female Peace Corps volunteer to a Burkinabé man in Gaoua, Burkina Faso. Their plan was to move to America shortly after the marriage. At the time, I never imagined anything of the sort for myself, but I was very happy for them, that they could share their lives together in the place of their mutual choosing.

And now I thought that I could do a similar thing for myself. Of course I couldn’t marry Norbert anywhere in West Africa, but surely I could bring Norbert to Massachusetts, get married there, and that would be that. We are totally ready to make that commitment. But then I researched more, and was surprised at what I discovered.

Although lesbian and gay couples can legally marry in several American states, these marriages are not recognized in any way by the federal government. That’s because in 1996, the US passed the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). This act set the national definition of marriage as a union between one man and one woman, no matter what other countries or American states decide for themselves on the issue. So same-sex couples who are legally married in Canada or South Africa or even Connecticut have no recognition of their marriage from the US federal government. That means they have no recognition of their relationship from US immigration law. But there must be some other options, right?

The fact of the matter is that although many countries in the world offer some legal avenue for same-sex couples to sponsor each other for immigration purposes, the US offers none. As far as the US government is concerned, my relationship with Norbert is nothing.

I had no idea.

I joined the Peace Corps for a lot of reasons, and pride for my country was an important one among them. I was excited about the cultural sharing, and to educate others about the land of the free and the home of the brave. Although I was deeply disappointed after learning about this bigoted immigration policy, I am still proud that I can raise my voice against it.

I could pick any single woman off the street and get her a fiancée visa to the US by simply declaring my intention to marry her. No matter who the woman is, the legal avenue is there. But because Norbert and I are both men, I have no legal standing to help Norbert immigrate to the US. That is wrong.

This is why marriage matters, to me. This is why it is so important that same-sex couples are able to marry in all 50 states, and why the federal government must stop discriminating against married lesbian and gay couples. It’s the right thing to do.

There is reason to believe that DOMA will reach the Supreme Court, where it may be struck down. But things like that are slow, and my Peace Corps service is finishing soon. Even if Congress passes the seemingly-more-politically-appetizing Uniting American Families Act, which would simply allow same-sex couples to sponsor their partners for immigration purposes, it won’t happen soon enough to alleviate our immediate concerns.

Norbert is currently paying me an extended visit in Guinea. We know he is incredibly lucky. He applied for a US tourist visa in Ouagadougou, and it was granted. He is now allowed to travel to the US for a short amount of time. What will we do when that time is up? We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. It frustrates me that our relationship has no recognition from my country.

But if enough people learn about this issue and take a stand, I am confident that, one day, we can achieve marriage equality for all and keep all binational couples together. If you have never thought about this issue before today, please consider sharing this story with your friends. We need to speak up now.

(Cross-posted with permission from Phil Goes To Guinea.)

Stop The Deportations - The DOMA Project Welcomes Los Angeles Summer Intern, Justin Page

2011-05-25T20:18:00.000-07:00

Born in Northern California, Justin Page is a Political Science undergraduate Honors student at California State Polytechnic University, Pomona, one of the most culturally diverse campuses in the nation. He is pursuing a minor in Chicano/Latino Studies with the intention of pursuing a career in immigration law. Justin has already begun working toward that goal by participating in the renowned and highly-competitive American Mock Trial Association tournaments, winning multiple Top-Attorney and Witness awards in his first regional competition. Justin has served his university in Student Government, Residential Advising, Orientation Services, the Cultural Centers. Most recently he worked as an intern with the Office of U.S. Senator Dianne Feinstein.

Married Gay Binational Couple in Exile for Six Years After Fulbright Teacher from Nashville Falls in Love in Austria

2011-05-23T12:02:00.000-07:00

Andy and Achim at their wedding in June 2006

Growing up in Nashville, Tennessee, I always dreamed of traveling and seeing the world. I finally got my chance in college and again after graduation. I applied for a job abroad as an English Teaching Assistant through the Fulbright Program. I was offered a position at an Austrian secondary school, and I was accepted. At the time, I assumed that I was heading off to Europe or a year, maybe two at most, before returning to the U.S. and moving to New York City.

Of course, life unfolds differently than we plan. In a small Austrian village nestled in the foothills of the Alps, I met Achim, the love of my life.

Sometimes, there are things in life that are just so clear that you don't have to think about what is right, you just know it. My father still recalls the first time I talked on the phone with him after meeting Achim. "You could just hear the excitement in your voice... I knew Achim was someone very special and that you were happy." And happy we were. Within two months, we were living together... and I'll never forgot the moment when we told each other: this is it, this is our forever.

That day was January 1, 2005. It was precisely 98 days after we first met. We had celebrated the New Year gazing over the rooftops of Vienna, watching people waltz under the fireworks. Back then I have to admit that we were a little naïve. After all, binational couples fall in love, get married, and live together all the time. But while our friends and family in Austria and Tennessee treated us just like any other engaged couple, the U.S. government saw things differently.

While today Austria has a "civil unions" law back in 2005 they did not. I was well aware that the United States government did not recognize gay marriage. The Defense of Marriage Act meant that we were trapped between Nashville and Austria, our love was in a legal limbo. What I was not aware of, though, was how difficult it was to immigrate to the United States. Achim and I were quickly educated. If you are not an highly qualified professional it is nearly impossible to immigrate into the U.S. without being married to a citizen. We consulted a lawyer in the U.S., who tried to be helpful and suggested that maybe Achim could get lucky in the Green Card Lottery... or perhaps my dad's employer could offer him an internship or a job that would qualify Achim for an H1B visa.

None of these alternatives would help us achieve our goal. We didn't want to live hoping for hoping for a temporary visa. We wanted to live our lives together WITHOUT a expiration date. It became so clear to us that I should be able to sponsor Achim as my spouse, but because we were gay that avenue was foreclosed to us.

After months of worry, research and tears, we finally found a solution. As an EU citizen, Achim has the right to live in any EU country if he has work there. So we surveyed our options. Back in 2004/2005, there was marriage equality in the Netherlands; but that was not particularly helpful, as neither of us spoke Dutch, which would, of course, make it extraordinarily difficult to find a job. Without a job we could not prove to the authorities that Achim had an income to support both of us should I be unable to work. Fortunately, a change in the German Civil Unions law at the end of 2005 made Germany an option. That meant that we "only" had to (1) move to a third country, away from both of our families, and (2) Achim had to find a job there. Somehow, we made it all happen. Looking back today, I'm amazed to think that we figured out we could move to Germany in February 2006, we moved there in the middle of May, and we got married in the presence of both our families in the middle of June.

Today, five years later, we have met lots of wonderful people here in Dortmund, Germany. Yet, not a single day goes by when we don't miss our family in Nashville and in Austria. We are so lucky to have families that have supported us every step of the way. But in a way that makes the separation even more painful sometimes. In the meantime, Austria has changed it laws to recognize civil unions, so we could move back there and be close to Achim's family. The USA, though remains closed to us. I would love to be able to move home and share my culture and where I come from with Achim for real—not just a two week visit—but it is hard to keep up hope that this dream will come true. I wish that Washington would realize that they are playing here with real people and real lives, that we are not political footballs. American families have been torn apart because of a senseless law. Real "family values" politicians ought to be working as hard as they can to keep families together, not deport them, separate them, or force them into exile.

(Below, Andy and Achim featured in the Austrian daily newspaper, Der Standard.)

IPS: Activists Fight Deportations of Gay Couples

2011-05-19T05:27:00.000-07:00

See full article here.

"After Erwin de Leon successfully defended his dissertation, he felt relief at being closer to earning his doctorate in public and urban policy. But the achievement also meant that time was running out to find a way to stay in the United States.

Despite the fact that de Leon, a Philippine international student, is married to a U.S. citizen, John Beddingfield, both live in uncertainty about the future of their family.

The hopes of de Leon and other activists were raised earlier this year when President Barack Obama declared that Section 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) was unconstitutional. This section defines marriage as "a legal union between one man and one woman".

On Apr. 6, a coalition of member organizations of the American Immigration Lawyers Association sent a letter to the Department of Homeland Security emphasizing family unity, for straight and gay couples, as a guiding principle of U.S. immigration law.

The co-founder of the campaign Stop the Deportations-The DOMA Project, Lavi Soloway, told IPS that "more than 65 members of Congress requested the White House to hold green card applications in abeyance and suspend the deportations."

Soloway cited the hold placed on deportation proceedings for Argentine immigrant Monica Alcota, who is married to Cristina Ojeda, a U.S. citizen, by a New York immigration judge in March as a turning point in the debate.

Although de Leon and Beddingfield have been in a committed relationship for close to 13 years, they have yet to fully settle down and buy a house. "We really don't know what is going to happen, we might have to move to Canada or another country in the following years," de Leon told IPS.

To guarantee residency rights for gay couples, Democrats in both the House and Senate re-introduced the Uniting American Families Act (UAFA) on Apr.14. But Soloway said that with the House dominated by Republicans and the Senate by Democrats, the "Congress is frozen."

He said that the UAFA has gained more supporters during the 11 years it has been debated in Congress, but is still far from having a majority of votes. Thus, one possible solution for the project to move forward is its inclusion in a comprehensive immigration reform package."

Binational Couple Asks: Is Our Love Less Than Yours?

2011-05-18T13:42:00.000-07:00

Full article and photos by Karen Ocamb here.

Andrew Sullivan: Imagine the U.S. Deported Your Spouse

2011-05-18T12:32:00.000-07:00

See post on The Daily Beast. Thanks, Andrew!

Marriage News Watch Interview: Lavi Soloway on Josh & Henry's Win and Other Recent Developments

2011-05-18T08:40:00.001-07:00

From Matt Baume at Marriage News Watch:

Everyone was stunned a few days ago when Attorney General Eric Holder intervened in gay couple's deportation case. The government was about to deport Paul Wilson Dorman, but at the last minute Holder told Board of Immigration Appeals to take a closer look at the case.
That's made the complicated rules about separating bi-national LGBTs even more complicated. So we're going to talk to Lavi Soloway, the lawyer for another bi-national couple facing deportation. Henry Velandia and Josh Vandiver had an deportation hearing just one day after Holder's decision, but that decision changed everything. Lavi's going to take us inside the court and tell us exactly what happened.

The Advocate: "Binational Couples Demanding Their Rights" is a Reason to Have Pride

2011-05-17T22:12:00.000-07:00

Salon's Green Greenwald: The Evils of DOMA

2011-05-17T21:13:00.000-07:00

Read full post here. Glenn notes:

I genuinely can't comprehend how any person could watch this video -- and there are tens of thousands of couples in the same situation -- and support this outcome; that includes -- perhaps especially -- "small government" conservatives incessantly insisting that the Federal Government should not be intervening in people's lives and making decisions for them.

Josh & Henry on CNN: "We came very close to having our marriage destroyed"

2011-05-17T14:18:00.000-07:00

From CNN.COM:

Last year, Velandia, a dancer from Venezuela, and Vandiver, a Princeton graduate student, were legally married in Connecticut. But under federal law—the Defense of Marriage Act—immigration authorities don’t recognize same-sex marriages and Velandia was denied legal residency in the United States. But Judge Alberto J. Riefkohl granted an adjournment in Newark’s Immigration Court, according to Advocate.com, mentioning “the possibility that the definition of marriage may be changed or amended.”

Were you able to celebrate the judge’s ruling?

JOSH: We breathed a huge sigh of relief. We came very close to having our marriage destroyed. The judge could have issued a deportation order on that day. If Henry had been deported, we would have been separated for a minimum of ten years.

I can’t describe how it feels to sit in a court room and face a judge who could deport your spouse. I felt sick to my stomach. I couldn’t believe this was happening in America. The spouse of an American was about to be deported simply because we are a gay couple.

HENRY: I was able to breathe again. We had a special dinner that night with my mom and close friends, but we know that the storm just got quiet. There is much more to come and we need to be ready.

Why are heterosexual bi-national couples protected under immigration laws, but same-sex couples are not?

J: It is a very straightforward process for heterosexual bi-national couples to stay together.

The American citizen files an I-130 petition for alien relative with USCIS (U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services) for the foreign-born spouse. As long as the couple can show the marriage is real, the petition is approved within months and the spouse becomes eligible for a “green card.”

I filed exactly the same petition for Henry, my spouse. But it was denied. USCIS cited the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) as the sole reason for denying the petition.

Our immigration laws are designed to bring and keep families together. But DOMA, a federal law enacted in 1996, bars the federal government from recognizing the legal marriages of same-sex couples. This is despite the fact that five states and the District of Columbia permit gay and lesbian couples to marry, and these marriages have been going on for years, beginning in Massachusetts on May 17, 2004.

Because of DOMA, the government acts like our marriage doesn’t exist. It treats us like complete strangers. As a result, I’m denied my right to sponsor my spouse to be with me here in my country. If we were a heterosexual couple, Henry would already be a permanent resident. Because we’re gay, he’s about to be deported.

How many couples are in the same situation as both of you?

H: There are thousands of couples suffering the cruel impact of DOMA, tearing families apart based on an unrealistic law. It is even causing a huge impact on the younger generations, destroying their dream of loving who they want to love and staying with who they want to stay with.

Lots of young gay and lesbian couples have shared with us their despair and sadness of not being able to stay together with the person they love. They’ve gotten in touch with us through our Facebook page (www.Facebook.com/SaveOurMarriage), which now has over 10,000 supporters.

J: Immigration Equality reports that there are over 36,000 same-sex bi-national couples in the U.S. Henry and I have personally gotten to know hundreds of couples like us, couples here in the U.S.who are facing deportation. And we’ve gotten letters from couples who have been forced to go in exile abroad in order to stay together.

Rather than be separated from their spouse, the Americans gave up their home here and became refugees. It’s very brave what they’ve done to be together. But it causes huge hardship. No American should have to go into exile to stay with his or her spouse.

The real culprit here is DOMA. It denies federal recognition to all same-sex married couples. Based on the last census it is estimated that there are 150,000 same-sex married couples in the United States. Every single one of those couples is denied the rights that non-gay couples receive. It’s not right.

In your view, what is the difference between same-sex civil unions and same-sex marriage?

J: Henry and I both wanted to get married. That’s why we went to Connecticut, as New Jersey only has civil unions at this point.

We got married because we love each other and wanted to publically commit to being together for the rest of our lives. I’m from Colorado and he’s fromVenezuela. In both our cultures, marriage is the ceremony in which you commit to your spouse before family and friends. And that’s what we wanted, too.

Our marriage certificate is exactly the same as every other marriage certificate in the United States. We believe very strongly in full marriage equality. Our parents and grandparents got married, and we believe we should be able to express our commitment to each other the same way. It has tremendous cultural and legal significance and it is in keeping with how we feel about each other.

H: I think all human beings have the right to say ‘my husband’ or ‘my wife’ and not ‘my civil union partner’. We don’t want to be second-class citizens. My husband, an American born and raised, shouldn’t be put in that category. He is a person, a citizen, and he deserves the right to love and have his love for me treated equally under the law.

You’ve got to return to court in December. What will happen then?

H: We are hoping that between now and December that there will be change, that a wake-up call will happen in America. We need immediate action from Secretary Napolitano to stop the deportations of same-sex spouses. I’m still in deportation proceedings, so I’m still at risk of being taken away from my other half, but I am not alone. The government needs to act to protect all couples in this situation.

J: Henry’s deportation looms over of us every day. We’d rather be planning the rest of our life together, just like every other newlywed couple. Instead, we are fighting these legal battles to stay together and keep our love and marriage alive.

What happens in December ultimately depends on the Obama administration. We are urging the administration to immediately halt the deportations of spouses of gay and lesbian Americans. President Obama and Attorney General Holder have determined that DOMA is discriminatory and unconstitutional.

So why are the Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) attorneys still actively prosecuting the deportations of our spouses?

Secretary Janet Napolitano, as head of the Department of Homeland Security, of which ICE is a part, has the power to suspend these deportations.

Henry and I will be separated, and our marriage destroyed, long before DOMA is repealed by Congress or struck down by the Supreme Court. President Obama needs to instruct Napolitano immediately to protect couples like us from deportation and prevent the irreparable harm of being torn apart.

Based on what I read on your website (www.JoshandHenry.com) it seems that you were initially reluctant activists. What has being so public about all of this meant to you?

J: Neither of us wanted to be activists, that’s for sure. Henry is a professional dancer, and I’m studying to be a professor. But we had to fight for our love and our marriage.

As we heard from hundreds of couples like us, we realized that we had a duty to speak out for them too. It’s something we take very seriously. A lot of these couples can’t speak up, for fear of persecution, or they have been forced into exile and have no voice here at home.

We are trying our best to be their voice. Last summer we joined a group of bi-national couples like us who sought to challenge the Defense of Marriage Act in Immigration Court and helped launch StopTheDeportations to build a movement around this issue.

H: We both felt we needed to take a stand for our love even though we didn't know what it meant to be activists. We have taken this as our mission to bring change and to inspire, to educate and to speak out about this issue. This issue has been in the closet for way too long, silently neglecting the civil rights of gay and lesbian Americans for many years.

On Monday, The New York Times reported, in separate stories, that Rick Welts, the CEO and president of basketball team Phoenix Suns, and CNN anchor Don Lemon both revealed they are gay. The United States is still a very conservative country. Do you imagine a time when stories such as Welts’, Lemon’s and yours receive no media attention?

J: I definitely can imagine such a time. I grew up in rural Colorado, where no one said a word—at least not a good word—about the possibility that someone in our community, like me, could be gay. I bottled up everything inside and didn’t let it see the light of day. But times are changing, and it makes a huge difference every time a major figure is truthful about being gay.

Struggling against this discriminatory law, DOMA, I’ve realized that we can never take for granted that things will get better automatically. It takes action on our part, courage to be who we are and to accept others for who they are, to bring about change.

We have a ways to go before people in every corner of our country, and every walk of life—including professional athletics, entertainment, business and politics—can feel comfortable and safe openly being who they are.

Watch: MSNBC's Thomas Roberts Interviews Josh & Henry About Their Victory Halting DOMA Deportation

2011-05-17T09:25:00.003-07:00

This interview originally aired Monday May 9 when Thomas Roberts invited Josh & Henry back into the MSNBC studio to discuss their victory in court on Friday May 6. Josh and Henry were previously interviewed by Thomas Roberts on Thursday April 28. (h/t Equality Matters)

Washington Post Calls For Moratorium on Deportations of Lesbian and Gay Partners of U.S. Citizens

2011-05-15T20:30:00.003-07:00

Our voices are being heard! The Stop The Deportations campaign now has the support of one of the most influential editorial boards in the United States. The Washington Post has been working on this editorial for a week, responding to Henry Velandia's win of a reprieve from deportation on May 6 and the extraordinary action by the Attorney General in the Dorman case the day before. The Dorman case is the only time an Attorney General has ever intervened in the case of a deportation involving a gay binational couple.

DeVote Campaign: Video Features Out4Immigration and Interviews with Binational Couples

2011-05-15T00:43:00.000-07:00

Join Us This Saturday May 14 at Noon In Hollywood for the "United By Love, Divided By Law" Portrait Project

2011-05-11T23:11:00.000-07:00

For more information go to United By Love, Divided By Law.

Donald & Arthur: Together for 8 Years, Married Florida Couple Receives Notice of Deportation Proceedings

2011-05-10T08:00:00.003-07:00

Donald and Arthur will appear in Immigration Court in Miami on July 14
for a deportation hearing. Please help us save their marriage!

Getting Married on March 10, 2011 in Connecticut

When we were able to afford it, right away, Arthur and I rented a car and drove that car all the way to New Haven, Connecticut, where Arthur used to live. We loved driving up there together with all the music we so enjoyed picking out together all these years. Who could have predicted as we were picking out music for the store I was working for, we were actually creating, and laying the foundations upon which Arthur and I would be building a positive, new kind of freedom in our lives! We made great, passionate and joyous memories all the way up to Connecticut! Arthur and I got married just before my birthday, which was on March 10th. My sister Christine and her husband Jeffrey drove from Ohio to witness and take part in our marriage. This marriage gives each of them a new family member. Arthur will do his best to be a great brother-in-law and He’s going to be an even better Uncle to Jed, Sierrah, and my perfect little nephew Noah. My sister’s already explained “gay” to her children and Noah and Jed think I’m a very cool uncle (of course!) After the justice of the peace, Barbara Canali, officially declared us married and my mind soared. The details and amount of time that passed between that special, perfect moment and the moments on the road driving to our honeymoon at the Doubletree are quite a blur. The destination hotel, the Doubletree, in Orlando was the perfect choice.

Arthur and I had the pleasant surprise of being upgraded to a suite at the Doubletree when I told the desk person we had just gotten married in Connecticut. The staff was very happy to congratulate us and I felt so very welcome. Being accepted as a married couple is enough to elicit tears from me. Arthur and I proudly enjoyed our stay at the hotel and we spent two days in Walt Disney World where we were accepted as a couple without judgment.

On President's Day, I wrote an e-mail to the President. I told him that in March I would be marrying my boyfriend of eight years in Connecticut. I wrote that it would be a slap in the face for the federal government to then turn around and defend the Defense of Marriage act right after I got married. Two days later, the New York Times reported that President Obama would not defend DOMA in federal court cases because he believed it was unconstitutional. For a moment I felt my President, and my Attorney General had taken up a battle worth having. The government seemed to be making a righteous decision.

A few days after we got home from our wedding trip we got a letter in the mail. The letter from the Department of Homeland Security said Arthur had overstayed his visa and he was being placed in removal proceedings. Arthur’s deportation hearing is now scheduled for July 14. Arthur can stay here when the courts recognize he has a family member in the United States of America. According to my father, my sister, my husband, the State of Connecticut, and me I am his family. The Defense of Marriage Act is not doing anything; but attempting to tear my marriage apart.

Congressman Rush Holt of NJ has written to ask Janet Napolitano, The Secretary of The Department of Homeland Security for a moratorium on deportations of spouses of gay and lesbian Americans until the Federal Defense of Marriage Act’s fate has been decided. (She has the power to do this, as we saw in 2009 when she halted deportations of widows and widowers of U.S. citizens while Congress passed a legislative fix.)

If I could have one wish granted by my elected representatives it would be that our Congresswoman, Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, who is now the incoming Chair of the Democratic National Committee, and our Senators, Marco Rubio and Senator Bill Nelson, would join their colleagues in calling on the Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano and Attorney General Eric Holder to put all cases involving legally married same-sex couples on an indefinite "pause," or put a moratorium on deportations of spouses of gay and lesbian Americans, at least until the courts make a final decision on the Defense of Marriage Act’s constitutionality or it's repealed by Congress. If this doesn’t happen and legally married same sex spouses like Arthur are deported, they will be ineligible for re-entry for ten years. That’s unreasonable! It’s unconscionable!

We can easily contact our representatives in Congress. Just call Capitol Hill Switchboard 202-224-3121. You just call three times, twice you ask for your Senator (you have two) then you ask for your congressional representative. You just say hello, my name is ___, I live (give ‘em your address where you live). Tell them you voted for them (if true) and inform them that the 65 members of the House and Senate have written to Napolitano and Holder seeking a stop on deportations of married, same-sex bi-national couples until a the fate of the Defense of Marriage Act has been determined. We must act together. We can stop the deportations of our spouses if we stand together. Even before DOMA is repealed we have the tremendous power of our personal stories to keep it from destroying our lives.

There is only one courtroom that matters in 2011, and that is the court of public opinion. We must mobilize and change the hearts of minds of the American people and our elected representatives and ultimately this administration. Join us in this battle. Help us save our marriage and defeat DOMA.

OutFront Colorado: DOMA Separates Inger & Phillipa

2011-05-10T04:54:00.000-07:00

Lives on hold: Lesbian couple, one of thousands, torn apart by DOMA, immigration policy
By Nic Garcia

Phillipa, a British woman, and her partner, Coloradan Inger Knudson, embrace each other. The two haven't seen each other in nearly eight months.

When Coloradan Inger Knudson committed her life to Philippa, an English woman, atop Lookout Mountain in 2009, the last thing she feared was her family would be ripped apart by the United States government.

Philippa, who asked her last name not to be used out of fear of legal repercussions, packed up her life in the UK and was set to help Knudson raise her daughter in Colorado. But five days before she was to leave the UK in 2009 — information the couple had been given, information they believed would lead them to a permanent fix to their immigration troubles was wrong. After being in the US for 89 days, Philippa returned to the United Kingdom until the couple could find another path to be together.

Today, they communicate by email, Web cam and an Internet phone service. Often times, they spend more time trying to establish a workable connection then actually chatting about their day. And when they finally get a connection, there’s that seven hour time difference. Philippa has usually ended her work day – she has two jobs – and Knudson is eating lunch, studying for her new career as a massage therapist.

“This is our life,” Knudson said.

“People don’t realize, they think it’s the distance,” Phillipa echoes. “But it’s also time. I go through my morning, my day until 3 or 4 in the afternoon sometimes before we talk. We both have dual clocks on our cell phone so we know if it’s too early to call.”

Phillipa is quick to point out their immigration troubles is just a single case of discrimination by the federal government. She pointed out there are more than 1,000 rights tax-paying gay and lesbian couples are denied.

“I don’t understand any of it,” she said. “It’s outright discrimination, immigration or not. I’m (eventually) going to be moving to a country, where, for the last three years I’ve been treated like a criminal.”

What keeps them 5,000 miles apart is the national Defense of Marriage Act that defines marriage between a man and a woman at the federal level..."

Knudson said she would move to England if she could. But because her daughter’s father lives in Colorado, she can’t. So, she said, it’s a matter of time before either DOMA is repealed, the UAFA is passed or her daughter is old enough.

“I met somebody I share an emotional bond with, an intellectual bond with,” Knudson said about Philippa. “We laugh, she’s a really good person. I found someone I could believe in. I’ve never felt so valued in a relationship. I’ve never felt so safe in a relationship.”

Francisco & Bert: Married and Living in Exile in Stockholm for 12 Years With No End in Sight

2011-05-09T21:02:00.000-07:00

I'm one of the lucky ones. I live in a country, Sweden, where as the American half of a binational gay couple, I was welcomed with open arms and got a green card with a minimum of fuss nearly 12 years ago. So my husband, Francisco, and I haven't had to suffer any separation from each other except for the few months it took to process my papers back in 1998. Sweden has had a partnership law since 1995 which in 2009 was merged into the marriage law, erasing any distinction between gays and straights. And while just being part of a gay couple got me my green card, after three years of officially being a couple, I was entitled to citizenship, which I applied for and received.

But while Francisco and I have a good life in Sweden, our marriage isn't recognized in the United States because of the Defense of Marriage Act. That means that we do not actually have a choice but to live in Sweden. While we recognize our good fortune that we at least have the right to live together here, it can't be denied that we were forced to live here by discriminatory American laws.

And we're not accorded the respect that straight couples get. For instance, when we go through passport control each time we pass through O'Hare on our yearly visits to the U.S., it's always a minor trauma. Our worst experience was several years ago when we had the audacity to go up as a couple and present our passports together. The young woman behind the counter - she couldn't have been more than 25 - looked quizzically at our two passports and asked "Why are you up here together?" To which we replied, "We're married, we're family." Which was obviously not what she wanted to hear. She became visibly upset, turning red and angrily telling us "don't you ever come up together again. You're not married here, we don't allow that in this country." Shaken, we walked to the baggage claim to get our bags. "And they call America the home of the free?" Francisco said to me. "I don't think I want to come back again."

And while it may seem like merely an insult and a minor convenience, it's actually more than that. Immigration control officers are the police, and they have an extraordinary amount of power when it comes to dealing with non-Americans entering the country. Francisco essentially has no rights or legal connection to the U.S., and one certainly gets the feeling that merely complaining about being humiliated at passport control could get him sent packing back to Sweden on the next plane. There is no reason we should ever be treated this way while each year thousands of green cards are given to the spouses of American citizens. Francisco and I want to be free to decide to live in the United States at some point in the future. As an American citizen, if I choose to return, I believe Francisco should have the right to live in the U.S. as my spouse, just like any straight couple. This is a simple matter of human rights. This is just one reason why the Defense of Marriage Act has to go. It treats some married American citizens different than others. That has to end.

Victory for Josh & Henry: New York Times Coverage

2011-05-08T22:11:00.001-07:00

Fred R Conrad/The New York Times

Judge Gives Immigrant in Same-Sex Marriage a Reprieve From Deportation

By Julia Preston, New York Times

An immigration judge in Newark on Friday suspended the deportation of a Venezuelan man who is married to an American man, responding to an unusual signal this week from the Obama administration that it is exploring legal avenues for recognizing same-sex marriages in immigration cases.The Venezuelan, Henry Velandia, had been awaiting the hearing with dread, since immigration authorities had said it was the last step before his deportation. Mr. Velandia, a dancer, was legally married last year in Connecticut to Josh Vandiver, a graduate student at Princeton. Mr. Velandia was denied legal residency as Mr. Vandiver’s spouse because under a federal law, the Defense of Marriage Act, immigration authorities do not recognize same-sex marriage.

On Thursday, Attorney General Eric H. Holder Jr. intervened in a different immigration case involving a same-sex couple, suspending the deportation of a man from Ireland and sending his case back to the immigration appeals court, asking it to consider several possible grounds on which the Irishman might qualify for legal residency.

Citing the move by the attorney general, Judge Alberto J. Riefkohl of immigration court in Newark postponed Mr. Velandia’s deportation until December at the earliest. The judge said he wanted to allow time for the attorney general and the appeals court to work out whether a gay partner might be eligible under some circumstances for residency.

Gay rights advocates said the back-to-back developments were an important sign that the Obama administration was working to bring consistency to its policy on same-sex marriage. The administration determined in February that the Defense of Marriage Act discriminates unconstitutionally against gay people.

Mr. Holder said then that the administration would no longer defend the act, also known as DOMA, in the courts, but would continue to enforce it until the courts reached a decision on whether it was constitutional.

Rachel B. Tiven, the executive director of Immigration Equality, a legal group that advocates for gay immigrants, said the change of course in the two cases had sent “a signal of openness” from the administration.

“Something is shifting and opening, and change is on the horizon,” Ms. Tiven said.

Supporters of the Defense of Marriage Act, which defines marriage for the purposes of federal law as between a man and a woman, reacted strongly to Mr. Holder’s action.

Representative Lamar Smith of Texas, the Republican who is chairman of the House Judiciary Committee, said the attorney general had “instructed an immigration court to ignore DOMA in future rulings.”

Mr. Smith said the administration was “coming dangerously close to giving the impression they don’t care what the law says.”

In Newark, Mr. Velandia and Mr. Vandiver were mainly relieved that they had avoided separation. “We know this is just a reprieve,” Mr. Vandiver said. “But every day we can have together is invaluable.”

Mr. Velandia, 27, is a salsa dancer who came to the United States in 2002 and failed in his effort to gain an employment visa. He has become a poster case for gay immigrants across the country, as he and Mr. Vandiver, 29, gathered thousands of signatures on an online petition asking Janet Napolitano, the secretary of homeland security, to suspend deportations for all same-sex spouses.

Before the hearing, dozens of gay rights protesters demonstrated on the sidewalk in front of the federal building in Newark where the immigration court is housed.

Judge Riefkohl noted in the hearing that Mr. Velandia and Mr. Vandiver were a married couple, and he said he wanted to wait for the outcome of the immigration appeals court’s reconsideration of the case of the Irish immigrant.

“We won the victory we were looking for,” said Lavi Soloway, the lawyer for Mr. Velandia and Mr. Vandiver. “The government acknowledged that Henry’s removal was no longer a foregone conclusion.”

The Irishman, Paul Wilson Dorman, came to the United States in 1996 and stayed beyond the term of his visa. But in a potentially important wrinkle, Mr. Dorman joined with an American citizen in June 2009 in a civil union — not a marriage — in New Jersey. That state does not offer same-sex marriage.

His lawyer, Nicholas J. Mundy, said the courts had denied his partner’s petition for a permanent resident visa for Mr. Dorman. But Mr. Holder asked the immigration appeals court to re-examine the case to determine whether Mr. Dorman might qualify for the visa by virtue of his civil union.

Mr. Mundy said he was optimistic about the significance for gay immigrants of Mr. Holder’s action. “It is an extraordinary measure,” he said, “and it sends a clear message that the Obama administration intends to do away with DOMA in its entirety.”

Ms. Tiven, of Immigration Equality, was more cautious. “This is not yet the solution that thousands of families clearly need,” she said.